Moonchild | KNJ & Reader

First Day Back (Your POV)

Your POV

It's the first day of the new academic year and I'm already dreading for it to officially begin. I'm going to stay in Kyungsung University for this week but then transfer to Sungkyunkwan University in Seoul. I can't wait for this week to end so that I can finally go back to Seoul. But I'm not even sure why I want to go back to Seoul so bad. Namjoon's not even there yet. I woke up half an hour ago and I'm feeling so tired. I think Namjoon really is trying to impress the ARMYs. I scroll through the headlines on my phone and seeing that BTS's concert in New York was a success gives me all the satisfaction I could hope for. I pick up my bag and reluctantly trudge out the safety of my house towards the bus stop. And then I see Gi looking out of the bus approaching the stop. I'd forgotten all about her and as much as I wanted to talk to her, I didn't want to as well. Sometimes too many things happen between people but the memories still tug at you. But I won't give in to mere moments of the past, she'd humiliated me way too much for it to be easily overlooked. 

"Hi.", Gi greeted half-heartedly. 

I walked past her and ignored her. She kept on throwing me glances every few minutes throughout the journey and I fought the urge to go and sit next to her and start gossiping like we used to do. She had been my friend since we were four and the thought of not being friends anymore was enough to make me feel sick. We got of at the same stop and again she tried to start a convo. But I ignored her again. I'm sorry Gi. It hurts to be like this to you. You've been there for me always but when I needed you most, you failed me. Maybe I'd put too much trust in you as well. Seems as if the world holds true, this is a harsh but very beautiful place. 

"Hey Y/N! Come here!", Je-ni called out. 

I walked towards her. Watching her happily chat away with Min made me miss Gi.

"Hi guys.", I greeted them. 

Je-ni and Min were as close as me and Gi used to be. And then me, Gi, Je-ni and Min were the closest girl group in our year. 

"Annyeonghaseyeong.", Min said, "Where's Gi?"

"I don't know.", I lied. 

Then Gi approached from behind conveniently.

"Hey Gi!", Je-ni greeted excitedly, "Look girl.", she started looking at me, "We've kept our cover up for so long and I can't do it for much longer! How's Namjoon?", at first I was confused why she was asking me that but then I realised that they must have seen on the V-live.

"Oh him. He's great.", I mumbled. 

I was missing him all over again. I'd already texted Min and Je-ni excitedly the day after all the action happened between me and Namjoon. But I hadn't really tried to directly think about him recently because even his name makes me ache every where. Ugh! I want to cry all over again. Is this what love does to you? But Y/N, you're going to have to get over him one day or the other so start from now. Don't cry over a boy. We've been calling every now and then when he has time but I'm sure it's only a few more days of long distance relationship before he forgets me completely. Even though I will go back to Seoul and even though he seems excited. ARMY means everything to him, I'll just be another ARMY, I'm sure. This summer has been amazing, beyond all my dreams and he's given me everything I could've imagined but it's going to end won't it?

"You don't seem so happy about it all. Has something happened between you two already?", Min asked.

"No."

"Then?", Min prompted

"I kind of miss him."

"Oh Y/N! Don't worry. You'll see him soon enough. When's he coming back form New York?", Min questioned.

"Min, they're going to a lot of other places before they come back. Places like Toronto and London and Sydney. And even when he comes back, how do you expect Y/N to go and visit him in Seoul in the middle of the school week?", Je-ni explained, "That brings me on to something else. How was your holiday at Seoul you two?"

"It was amazing.", Gi exclaimed.

"What was the best part?", Min interrogated.

"The fan sign is definitely at the top of my list. How about you Y/N?", Gi directed the question at me and I didn't want to answer it. 

Je-ni sensed the tension between us.

"Guys, I can sense something between you two. You lot aren't usually like this. What's going on?", she asked.

"Not something I'd like to talk about.", Gi muttered.

Perfect opportunity to divert the topic. "Actually, I have something to tell you guys."

Gi looked at me, her eyes wide open in disbelief, she thought I was going to tell them about the fight. Trust me, I'm not as evil as you Gi.

"Go on.", Je-ni simply said. 

She too thought I was going to explain what was going on.

"I'm moving to Sungkyunkwan University in Seoul.", I blurted it out all at once.

"Sorry? What did you say? I think I may have misheard.", Min stated.

"You didn't hear it wrong."

"What do you mean?", Gi quizzed. 

"I'm moving there. The school contacted me and they said that I'd be able to study better there. And I think I want to take the chance."

"The chance? What chance is there?", Je-ni questioned.

"I'm risking losing all of you but it's for my career.", I gulped visibly. That sounds mean, "I mean we can all keep connected still. I won't forget you lot because you're my best friends."

Ugh but I can't tell them it's to be closer to Namjoon.

"I know it's not what it used to be like between us but I can still sense it when you lie. It's not for your career.", Gi announced. 

It wasn't a question, it was a statement. She wasn't taking any but's and she knew.

But I had to try anyway, "Guys! It's nothing like that."

"Don't worry. We understand.", Min whispered. 

No, you don't understand. You think that I'm choosing Namjoon over all of you. I wouldn't ever do that because he'll ditch me any day as a fling. I'm just summing up everything. And I'm broken, I was broken, he healed me so I want to snatch as many pieces as possible before it fades away. I can't be selfish can I just for wanting my own best for once.

"I didn't think you would be like this Y/N. Come on girls, we've got other stuff to do.", Gi commanded.

I knew she'd be like that. Snatch my title away from me as soon as she sees the opportunity. And then she walks away with my friends. The rest of the day wasn't any better. I was either getting bothered by people asking me about Namjoon or those who'd already found out, asking me about moving. Gi was like a plague. Her poison for me swiftly spreading and killing the love for me. Just watch when I become successful. I don't need you to achieve my dreams. Or at least that's what I thought when I stood at that moment.