This Feels So Right.

34: I Still Love You.

I thought that moving in with Dad would help me move on. But it hadn't two months on and I missed everyone from back home with a passion. The house was lonely and I was home alone most of the day. I was hoping I could confide in Dad but he was at work all day and when he was home he just wanted to rest so I didn't want to bother him. He was happy about the prospect of a grandchild but I could tell he was upset that Brian and I weren't together anymore.

Every day I fell further into depression and self-loathing. I had moved here to get my life together but it just kept falling apart and so did I. At least I had a little part of Brian left and thinking of our child did help me to cope.

I looked down at the piece of paper I had been absentmindedly sketching on and when I saw what I had drawn I scrunched the page up and threw it in the trash can. Why couldn't I stop thinking about him, his perfect features, and his personality? I still loved him so much.

"I wonder how he is" My conscious said "Maybe you should text Caleb and ask?"

"Stop it! Stop it! Stop thinking about him!" I shouted at myself as I run my hands through my hair from frustration. It only made pictures of him appear in my mind, pictures from when I called it all quits.

The mental image caused me to break down and I slumped over my desk, burying my face into my arms sobbing.

DING DONG! I looked up as I heard the doorbell, who could that be? I thought it over and then remembered that I had a package arriving any day now that contained some baby clothes. Somehow that cheered me up a little so I wiped away my tears and ran to the door.

I flung the door open to reveal the last person I expected to see "B- Brian?" I stuttered, fighting back the tears. "What are you doing here?" Emotions flooded my brain. Happiness and Sadness alike.

"Isn't it obvious? I can't bear not seeing you" He answered meaning every word. I could tell he was just as full of emotions.

'Tell him you feel the same' My conscious said.

I opened my mouth to tell him just that but my pride stepped in "We've been over this" I sighed and went to close the door in his face. 

"I quit my job" He said firmly.

I froze "I told you not to".

"I don't care what you told me. I love you Riley" He stated.

"I love you too, I always will but I can't be your girlfriend again" I sighed.

"Yes you can" My conscious insisted.

"That's OK" He smiled, I stared at him confused as he pulled a small velvet box from his pocket and began lowering himself to one knee "I'm not here to ask you to be my girlfriend Riley, I'm here to ask you to be my wife".

"Brian I-" I began to say, excitement growing in me, all the negative pride being replaced with good. Seeing him on one knee filled me with joy and I knew what I wanted to and HAD to say.

"Just say yes" He pleaded nervously and bit his lip slightly.

I shook my head playfully "Get off your knee" He looked at me and frowned as he rose to both feet, disappointed. 

I closed the space between us and kissed him. Slightly shocked he kissed back and it deepened to our old passion "Yes" I smiled.

"Yes?" He repeated in a tone of disbelief and happiness mixed together.

"Yes I'll marry you" happy tears ran down my cheeks.

He grinned and picked me up in an embrace, swinging me around. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he kissed me passionately.

When my feet landed on the ground once more Brian turned his attention to my stomach where a small bump had been steadily growing. He laid a hand on it and his smile deepened. "I can't wait to have this family with you" He said and with his spare hand he slipped the silver engagement ring onto my finger.