Trying Not To Love You

Chapter 19

Dean POV:

I want to talk to Seth and make him feel comfortable. I can't let him like this after someone who is not related to him, hurting his little heart because of me. He is not deserved to get any shit words from Becky because of the only reason that she is my girlfriend.

"Dean," Becky speaks loud enough for me to get over my thoughts and pay attention to her.

"What?" I ask in complete irritation as my mind covers with the disappointed face that Seth gave before he left the room.

"I know you have anger in me but try to understand my situation. Do you take it easy if I marry someone and tell you that it's just an accident?" She asks and I have no words for her question so I look down in embarrassment.

"I know you have no answer to this... Just like that, it also hurt me. I told you to leave my house but my heart doesn't ready to leave you. I tried to forget you but I couldn't.." She places her hand on my cheek and looks at me in the eyes, "Because I still love you even you hurt me."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I can give you reasons but I know it's not going to change anything that happened." I let out a sigh and grab her hands to pull them together.

"But Se-" Before I talk about Seth, she presses her lips on mine. She then hugs me and holds me tightly like I am the one for her. I get married so I think I am not deserved for her.

I pull her away from me and look at her in the eyes, "You deserve better, Becky. I'm not worth it for you and I don't want to break either of you or Seth's heart. He is very important to me even I know him for weeks.."

She gives me an unbelievable look and starts to cry, "I understand you don't want me so you're telling some reasons to avoid me.."

"No.. I didn't tell like that. I get married so it's not good if we continue our relationship." I try to convince her but she doesn't get any of my words and cries even more.

"You said easily but you don't know, how much it hurts me. I can understand you get married but you didn't love him... Because I'm in your heart and you're mine." She wipes her tears and places her hands on my cheeks, "I can understand you don't want him getting hurt so I don't hurt him anymore and try to friend with him."

I nod slowly and give her a weak smile. I think everything goes well so now, I can convince Seth with her. I grab her hand and take her to the living room to talk to him but he is not there. I find a small note on the coffee table and it reads that he went to the performance center.

Seth POV:

I don't want to disturb them and stand like a stone for their life so I get in the car to go to the performance center. As I drive the car, my mind thinks about Dean and gets hurt whenever his girlfriend comes in between.

I come out of my thoughts when I reach the performance center. I get out of the car and go inside to see Marek. He is talking on the phone so he waves a hand at me and lets me sit on the chair.

I feel bored so I take a pen and scribble on the note. "Morning," I look up at him when I hear his voice and notice he is finished talking on the phone.

"Morning," I mumble not in the mood to get into any conversation so I start to play with the pen cap.

I glance up at the door when I hear it is opened by someone. "Hey Seth," Roman says, hurrying through the door with a small girl in his arms.

"Hey," I wave a hand and smile at the two of them.

He is completely out of breath and his hair is a wild mess. He has a pink duffle bag hanging off his shoulder and it is stuffed with coloring books, arts and crafts, glitter and that is just what I can see.

The little one in his arms has black hair, brown eyes and a smudge of oatmeal on her face. They look like a mess but she seems happy about it.

"Shall we start practicing? But before that, can you take care of her while I'm going to the washroom?" He asks and shifts the little girl to his other side.

"Of course," I give him a smile and see her staring at me with a huge interest.

I get her from him and wipe the mess in her face. I place her on the table before sitting on the chair to start a conversation with her, "What's your name?"

"Joelle Reigns," She says and places her tiny hands on my hair, playing with it.

"That's cute. What are you doing at work with dad today?" I ask, hoping to come off as polite and not creepy.

"Mom went to some party so dad picked me up here. What's your name?" She asks in return and starts to braid some of my hair.

"Ouchh.." I whine when she tugs my hair a little hard and plays with it. "Seth Rollins. You can call me, Seth." I say and let her fingers off my hair as I see Roman coming towards us.

He gives me a soft smile and brings one of the coloring books to her before starting the practice. He watches me driving the car with Marek's instructions and encourages me.

I try my best to drive the car as fast as I can but the thoughts of Dean interrupt my mind. I let out a breath and try to continue but I can't so I get out of the car and sit on one of the chairs with my eyes closed.

I open my eyes when I feel a hand on my shoulder and find Roman sitting beside me. He asks what is bothering me but I lie to him. He understands that I lie to him so he continues asking me until I tell him what kind of married life between me and Dean.

I feel good after I spilled everything to him but I don't know what he thinks about me and Dean. He pats my shoulder and says, "Someone truly wants a heart like you to share what's them. Do you think it would work out?"

"I don't know, man. But he's not mine for just we get married. He loves her and wants to be with her so I don't want to stand in between them." I say and get up from the chair, not wanting to continue the conversation.