goodnight // lashton

đêm tốt.

Ashton's POV

I woke up in a room that was completely white, yet very dark. I hated it. I wanted to leave it. I sat up, taking a glance around the room., taking in a few things.

I was alone. My arm hurt very badly. It was wrapped up. I started unwrapping it because I was curious. I don't remember anything. I unwrapped it to reveal a bandage that went from the top of my wrist to my elbow. I might as well take that off, too.

"Oh, honey, I wouldn't do that." A lady said, grabbing my arm and guiding it away from my wrist. I looked at my hurt arm as she started wrapping it up again.

"What happened?" I asked, grabbing her long necklace in between my fingers. It dangled down pretty low, so I couldn't stop myself from grabbing it.

"You hurt yourself." She said, fastening the wrap with two safety pins. She sat down next to me on my bed, and I kept hold on her necklace.

"How?" I asked. I felt different. Like I was high. Am I high? Is that why I'm here?

"You took a sharp object and cut your skin up. We took you here so you could be saved." She said, patting my knee.

"I don't think I want to be saved." I said. My words were slurred together. 

"Now don't say that. You've got a full life ahead of you." She said. She looked serious. I smiled.

"I wanna sleep. I'm gonna sleep." I said, laying down, still keeping her necklace in my grip. I felt her leave, but her necklace stayed put in my hands. I was too tired to tell her that I didn't want to be alone.

~

Luke's POV

I heard the house phone start ringing. I went downstairs to answer it, but my mum beat me to it. 

"Hello?" She answered. The was a pause.

"Oh, hey, Laurie!" She said, taking a seat. Another pause. Confused look. Sad look. 

"Is he okay?" She asked. That earned a confused look from me. I knew she was Ashton's step-mum. What happened?

"What happened?" I asked. My mum held up a finger, not a nice one, which was her way of telling me to shut up. I got the message.

"We'll be down there. Alright. Bye." She said, and hung up the phone.

"What happened?" I asked. She looked at me.

"Do you know if Ashton's been upset recently?" She asked. I bit my tongue.

"He's seemed pretty happy to me." I lied. This has to do with the pencil sharpener. I know it does.

"Okay. He's in the hospital." She said. I swallowed loudly.

"What happened?" I asked for the third time.

"Don't quite know. Laurie was crying too hard. Something that involved stitches. Anyways, you coming?" She asked. I shook my head.

"I think I'd get too sad if I saw him in the hospital." I answered. Partly true. She nodded, and went upstairs to freshen up before leaving. I started sobbing after she left.

~

It took a full week for Ashton to come back. No one even realized he was gone until the teacher pointed it out on the last day of his absence. But I knew. It was all that I could think about. It was what corrupted my mind all day long.

When he finally came back, nobody asked him about it. I didn't see that Ryan guy hang out with him and Charlotte anymore. I guess Ryan and Charlotte broke up. Charlotte still talked to Ashton a lot. As soon as he came back, she left a group of girls she was hanging out with to go hang out with him. I'm glad he's not all alone. 

On the second day he was back, I needed answers. I needed to asked him about the sharpener that lacked blades. I needed to ask him about the hospital. I needed to ask him about all the long sleeves. He used to wear short sleeves with bracelets all the time. Why did that stop?

On the third day he was back, I planned to get my answers. As soon as the final bell rang, I found him and brought him to the back of the school.

"Why were you in the hospital?" I asked. He shrugged. I sighed.

"Did you hurt yourself?" I asked. He shook his head. 

"Roll up your sleeves." I said. He shook his head. I bit my lip. 

"Why won't you?" I asked.

"It's fucking cold." He answered.

"Not because of this?" I asked, holding up the sharpener that lacked blades. He bit his lip, and shook his head.

"Why won't you talk to me? Can't you see I'm trying?" I shouted. He flinched. I softened. He shook his head.

"Can't you see that you're not trying hard enough?" He shouted back. I didn't flinch. 

"This is the best I can do. I'm trying to make this easier for the both of us." I said, looking down. I didn't want to tell him. I didn't want to tell him I was only friends with Michael and Calum because they forced me to. I didn't want to tell them that they only liked me because I was good at football. I didn't want to tell him that I was only friends with them because they knew who I liked. 

I didn't want to tell him that I had the urge to kiss him right now.

He looked confused. I left without another word. 

~