Part 1: Snake In The Grass

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Sitting in my office for once- minding my own business- I'm less than pleased about being here, especially when Karen Brantley has me trapped and is once more up my ass about funding for the hospital. My latest programs have been helping patients, but less so the Dam itself. Though she has become more tolerable since the Nyler incident, she is less so of losing money.

"Max! We can't keep going in this direction. If we can't keep up funding- we will be forced to lose programs, make cutbacks, and eminently close down. So we need to fix the problem here!" She drones on and on like every other meeting she calls me into. I'm about ready to throw myself from the window.

"Karen, I have a hospital to run. I don't have time to sit here and make plans on how to get money. That's not my job nor department. If you think we need to do something- gala, auction- whatever- then plan it, have my me sign my approval and then get it going. I can't be called in every week to deal with something less important than patients and hospitality." I stand up and gesture for her to go to the door and leave. "Now if you come back with a solid solution- I will be more than happy to hop on board and sign whatever it is you need. But until then- don't bother me."

"I will be back with something and you will sign it and go along with it. We need funding Max. We're desperate..." I shut the door and lean against it. I am so tired of funding and stupid nonsensical, nonmedical shit. If I wanted to deal with money all day- I would've became a banker or an accountant. A knock on my door fuels me.

"What now!" I raise my voice as I open the door- only to find Helen Sharpe on the other side of it. She steps back and is slightly startled from my outburst. "Oh...sorry. I thought you were Brantley."

"No, she was walking down the hall just now. What's the matter?" She comes into my office and I shut the door.

"She's on me about funding again. Says I need to come up with a solution. Like that's my problem."

"And what did you tell her?"

"I told her to find the solution herself and let me know what she decides." She nods and leans against the bureau.

"Well, if we know her- she most definitely will. And it will undoubtedly work out and she won't hound you for the next 5 months. So don't worry about it. Alright?" She's right, like always.

"Thanks...it's just- bothersome. Last thing I'm trying to focus on is her demands. I'm just so stressed. Between her, the Dam, Luna- I'm up to my neck in water and I'm drowning." I lean stooped against my desk and she comes over to me. She's been trying to get me to open up and be vulnerable so I can get passed my grief and it's helping- a bit. But I'm still caught up on everything.

"You don't have to drown, Max. I've been throwing you a life preserver for a while now. All you have to do is reach out and take it." She wraps her arms around me and lays her head to my chest. I wrap my arms around her and hold her tightly. The last time we did this was over 10 months ago when we were both struggling with personal problems. It was the 5th day on the job and she was so honest and open with me. Something that very rarely happens with strangers. It's because of that that our bond is so strong and why I value her over everyone else. "I'm always here Max- you know that."

"I know...I just don't want to burden you or anyone for that matter." She pulls back slightly and looks up at me.

"Burden me, please. Always. In return, I'll burden you." I loosen my hold on her and wonder what's bothering her.

"What's going on?" She pulls away all together and heads towards my windows. She looks out of one and leans against the windowsill.

"I've just been doubting myself lately. If I'm doing my job the best I can. I mean- I show up, I try and heal who I can and try to comfort those I can't...but is it enough? I feel like since I came back from fundraising four months ago, that I haven't really done anything spectacular. Maybe it's my job or maybe it's just my personal life- but something is missing and off. I just don't know what it is." Walking over to her, I place my hand on the small of her back and I can feel a shiver run up her spine.

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