Walls

Progress

Phana's POV

The Moon and Star Competition is tomorrow. Yo has spent the last two days doing dress rehearsals and practicing the piano. Every day, I would take him to practice the piano and every day he would make me wait outside. I really wanted to hear him play, but he said he didn't want me to hear it until the competition. I would do anything he wanted, he already owned me.

"Are you feeling nervous about the competition?" I asked as we walked into our dorms. He'd just finished his practice and he looked tired.

"I'm feeling a little nervous, honestly," he said. "I've never had to perform in front of a lot of people before."

"You'll be fine. I've been through it myself," I said, putting my arm around his shoulders. "If you can't sleep, just let me know and we can talk about it."

"Okay," he said, continuing up to his room. "Thanks, P'Pha. I'll see you later."

He smiled at me as he walked away. I went to my room and laid down on my bed, thinking about my plans for tomorrow. After the competition, I planned to ask him to be my boyfriend. He already knew how I felt, I had done everything to try to show him in the last couple of days, but I wanted to make it official. I knew that I didn't deserve him or the forgiveness that he had shown me, but I was willing to do anything to keep him by my side.

No matter how much I tried, I couldn't sleep. The last few days with Yo had been some of my happiest memories. I'd known before that I had messed up when it came to Yo, but I hadn't realized just how close I had come to losing him. He liked me, but no one could be expected to hold on to a crush that was hurting him forever.

I was lucky I'd found my courage in time. Yo was popular, good-looking, and talented. He was well-liked by everyone and there were actually quite a few people that saw him as perfect boyfriend material. I couldn't blame them for wanting Yo, because I wanted him too. But that didn't mean I wasn't jealous and possessive.

Yo had been very clear about his feelings. He would be mine, but only if I was his. He was even willing to put up with my busy schedule. I wasn't going to let him down. I meant what I said to Forth, if Yo would have me, I was never going to let him go. I would keep him in my heart and be only his. I was so focused on my thoughts of Yo, that when someone knocked on my door, I was sure it was him.

I ran to the door, ready to pull Yo into my arms, but instead of seeing my adorable boy, I looked out to see Pring. I smiled, trying to be polite but feeling very unhappy that it wasn't actually Yo waiting here for me.

"Pha, we need to talk," Pring said, as she started pushing her way into my room. I was annoyed and was about to ask her to leave when I saw Yo coming around the corner toward my room. Thrilled, I passed Pring and walked over to Yo.

"You couldn't sleep?" I asked him. He looked over at Pring, who was still standing in my doorway, but I couldn't be bothered with her right now. I called to her over my shoulder, "Take whatever you need from my room, Ai'Pring. I'm going to stay with N'Yo."

I took his hand in mine and pulled him up the stairs to his room. When we got inside, we both sat down on his bed and I tried to pull him into my arms.

"You didn't have to come to my room with me," Yo said, looking at me uncertainly. "What if P'Pring steals something important from your room?"

"N'Yo, the only thing that I care about is right here in this room," I said. "She can steal everything in my room. As long as I still have your heart, then I have everything I want."

Yo looked at me for a minute, as if he was determining the validity of my words. I didn't know how else to earn his trust, so I would just keep being as honest and open as I could in the hopes that he would understand. He didn't say anything to me, but I thought he might be overthinking my relationship with Pring.

"Ai'Pring and I have been friends for awhile," I said, trying to ease his worry. "We've never been anything more. We're not even that close."

"Are you sure? She doesn't use honorifics when she's talking to you," Yo responded.

"She doesn't use honorifics, but I do," I clarified. "I have never felt anything for her other than friendship."

"I'm not trying to be make you feel bad," Yo said, making me nervous about his next words, "but you said you're trying to be clear with me. If that's really how you feel, you should be making it clear to her."

"Do you think I've done anything that she might misunderstand?" I asked.

"That's for you to decide," Yo said, but he looked uncomfortable. "I know gossip isn't usually truthful, but until a few days ago, I thought the two of you were dating."

"N'Yo, for me there's only you," I said. Yo smiled up at me and I held my breath.

"P'Pha," Yo said, resting his head on my shoulder, allowing me to hold him. "When I play the song during the competition, listen carefully. I'm dedicating it to you."

"For me?" I responded. "Is that why you wouldn't let me listen?"

"Umm," he said, nodding his head. He looked tired. I wanted to stay, but I knew he needed to rest and I wasn't sure that I could control myself if I stayed the night. So I pushed him down into his pillows, pulled the blankets up to cover him, and said, "Go to sleep."

I stayed sitting on his bed watching him until his breathing deepened. Then I slipped out of his room, locking the door behind me.