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#20 - Desperate for Confidence

Hii!

Okay so it's about a crush thingi.

So I'm NOT a shy person, let's clear that up. Whenever I'm with friends, I just be myself: hyper, loud...and the same goes for when I'm with guys. But whenever my crush is around, I suddenly shit up and start hiding...I really don't know what's got into me. My friends try so hard to get me close to him or at least just say 'hi' but I seem to chicken out. My friends dare me to do little things just so it can give me confidence that he's a normal human being (and not Harry Styles). I even once put a cute (anonymous) note in his locker and he really liked it.

When he's not around, I go on and on about him. But when he is, I just back out.

Any advice?

- Desperate for Confidence

::

Hiya honey.

You'd be glad to know that you're not the only one who gets all dumbstruck when in front of their crush - it's the problem that millions of girls around the globe go through. Including me.

I can't say that I have the exact remedy for it, though, but I will certainly do my best to help. I've a few things that I'd suggest, and I'll number them like always so it's easier for you to gather.

1. Group Conversations

One thing I'm always ever grateful for my friends is that when they know I like someone, as much as they'll push me to talk to him alone, they'll also try to help me out by joining in the conversation for a while.

So, he'll be hanging out with some two or three friends, and me and my two or three friends will go and join in. I feel more comfortable that way, and I can almost act like my normal self. Obviously, I know that he's there, but when other people are around too it can help take your mind off the daunting task that is to even look at him.

So ask your friends to help you talk to him by coming with you.

Pros: He'll at least get to see your hyper, loud self around your friends!

Cons: I don't know if this goes for you, but what would happen to me is that I would get all quiet and hide behind my friends in the sense that I'd let them do all the talking.

If that happens to you, at least smile and laugh when appropriate haha:)

2. Social Media

I've been talking a lot about this recently, huh!

So I don't particularly encourage this when approaching a guy you like but it may just help you to build your confidence and gain some courage to speak to him.

Talk to him online. Personally I'd go for Facebook or Whatsapp, because they are a more personal way of messaging rather than on something like Twitter or whatever, because it keeps a conversation going.

The reason I'm usually hesitant to do this is because you may end up hiding behind your words. I mean, I've done it before. There was a guy that I liked so much but could never approach him in person, and so I resorted to facebook to talk to him. We got so close and we used to talk like everyday...but never in person. And that's the worst thing you can do, because it felt like shit passing him in the hallways and not even saying 'hi'...

But, little steps. It's a great way to get a conversation going without having to look him in the eye and whatnot.

Hit him up with a simple:

hello! how are you doing? xx

Be fun and cheerful. Be sure to use plenty of smileys (but not too many) so you seem interested in the conversation and also fun to talk to! Of course, be yourself: there's no one better than that. Talk about stuff you like, and also stuff he likes.