Elsker

40. First Impressions

Allison

Its crazy how our appearances, for some reason, mean everything to others and ourselves. If we were to look at science, logically speaking, our appearances only are for one purpose: to find a mate and reproduce so that we may continue our species. Various different species have sexual dimorphism. A peacock for example has bright colors to attract a mate to reproduce. Yet to us humans we focus on our appearances because... why? Setting aside the science, the logic, and the sociological studies of social constructs, our appearances dont matter. Although I have come to these conclusions, I still stand in front of a full length mirror and critique my attire.

I've met Malcolm twice now, I think, so my appearance is not for him but rather his wife. Meeting the best friend's wife is crucial. If she doesnt like me then she tells Malcolm and he doesnt accept invitations and next thing I know Mads has lost a friend. If Mads loses a friend over me, he wont want me anymore, right? I think thats how it works. No, not with Mads. The man would lose all major organs for me. Losing a friend wouldnt even faze him. It wouldnt be fair though.

I must have been standing in the closet too long because Mads walks in clasping his hands together with a smile to put me at ease.

"You look gorgeous, as always," he says.

I wore a black, spaghetti strap, maxi dress with golden stars and moons. It was casual, playful, and loose. It showed my cleavage in a classy way. My hair was in a loose bun.

"Do you think she'll like me?" I ask nervously.

Mads chuckles.

"Part of me wants to say everyone likes you, and another part of me wants to say it doesnt matter whether she does or not."

I look down at my hands which pull at the dress.

"Im over reacting, arent I?"

He slowly walks to me. His hands move out of his slack pockets and go to cup my face. He looks down to my eye level.

"Over reacting and people pleasing. Two things that will take time to adjust. You're aware of them, have accepted them, now we can change them. We all have things that we do that are toxic to ourselves. It is important though that we realize its something we must change. Those toxic things live inside our hearts, it tries to change us and make us into something we dont want to be. It may seem good at the time but in the end it hurts us and sometimes others. Our hearts are decietful like that, elsker," He says so poetically that it makes me smile.

I sigh. I take in his words and take in the feeling of his skin on my own.

"Vincent has a great way with words," I say with a giggle.

Mads sighs. "Those words could have been my own," he argues.

I shake my head as he drops his hands from my face. He crosses his arms over his chest.

"That sounds too biblical to be your own words," I argue.

He bites his lips and shrugs.

"It was biblical... it was from the sermon you missed a couple weeks back-"

"Ha! I was right!"