Okay Days

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TW// Sexual Abuse

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TW// Sexual Abuse

        "I—AM I supposed to know who that is?" I mumble, frowning. "Did you two go out or something? I don't understand."

        Sebastian makes a strangled sound in the back of his throat and I squeeze his hand. "Hey," I whisper and he looks up at me. "You can tell me anything. You know that right?"

        He nods and takes a shaky breath, swiping the tears from his face. Sebastian clears his throat once, shoulders crumpling. "After my dad died, my mom dated around a lot," he murmurs. "Like I told you, some of them were awful. There was one that only used my mom for money, another for status. The worst was Robert Mackintosh."

He takes a deep breath and a few moments have to pass by before he can even speak again. "Robert was an attorney. Hotshot, a killer in the courtroom as they called it. Mom was head over heels for him when they first met. I remember he'd send her flowers in the middle of the day and have chocolates waiting for her almost every night. He was nice to me, too. We used to watch TV together every Saturday and sometimes go swimming.

"But Robert...he wasn't who we thought he was," Sebastian continues, voice somber. "He would have these drunk episodes where he'd hit my mom or toss everything he could find. Especially her good china. He loved ruining everything that was good."

His eyes turn misty and I can see how clearly he's remembering everything. "I wasn't around for the fights a lot. Like, I wouldn't listen to them after a while. I'd just put on headphones and blast my music until it got quiet again. After maybe the fourth time, it didn't even faze me anymore.

"But then he would start coming into my room at night," Sebastian croaks, voice taut. "It would be dark and he'd whisper...things to me. He'd touch me a-and he'd make me—"

Sebastian sobs painfully and I lean forward and wrap my around his strong frame. He cries into my shirt, nose pressing against my shoulder and I feel my own tears well up at his pain. Things became abundantly clear in an instant. Why he could never bring himself to trust Victor, why he was in a bad mental state after sleeping with Nate, why there always seemed to be something he was holding onto.

He pulls back, sniffing and wiping his tears again. His nose was red with emotion and his cheeks were blotchy, but all I could see was the sheer agony on his face. "It's okay," he mumbles and then laughs. "I mean, it's not okay. My mom broke up with him after, like, the third month of him doing that to me. He even moved to New York. I don't think she ever knew. I couldn't even tell her because...I don't know. I thought that he'd hurt us both, somehow.

"The summer I got faded with Nate and we slept together was the same summer he moved back to Malibu," he continues. "I went to his job one day. I just wanted to see his face. I wanted to see the face of the person who lived with what he did to a little kid every single day." Sebastian's face turns angry and then in an instant, emotionless. "He wouldn't even see me. He had security escort me out before I could make it to his office. He was a coward.

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