𝗽𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘁𝘀 :)

wHaT iS tHiS? a ClIcHe FiElD tRiP? •1•

"I'm gonna die," Peter said for probably the hundredth time.

"There's bleach in the cabinet," Ned supplied. Peter started to get up, but Ned stopped him. "C'mon, you won't die just...be almost dead?"

"So helpful, all I've got to do is hide this from geniuses and spies, no problem," Peter retorted sarcastically as he swung his backpack onto his shoulder.

"It could be fine!" Ned argued. Peter ignored him and waved to Happy. "See you tomorrow," he told Ned and jogged down the steps.

"Hey Happy," the young teen greeted. Peter hopped in the car and started talking all about his day until Happy rolled up the divider.

Peter stared at the permission slip, seriously considering burning it. He decided against it. He'd just ask Pops to sign it and not tell anyone. 

*time skip, his name is Joe*

"Hey Pops," Peter bounded into the kitchen. "Can you sign this?" Peter handed Steve the permission slip. "Please don't tell the others."

Steve agreed and signed.

Unfortunately, a certain bird saw the whole thing from the vents. He's curried off with a smile plastered in his face. Oh this would be fun.

*time skip until tomorrow bc nothing happened really(btw, this is Maria. She is Joe's sister)*

"Hey penis, ready for your lies to be exposed?" Flash taunted.

"F*ck off Eugene," MJ snapped. 

"Ooh, did you finally grow some balls?"

"You know, acting like a d*ck won't make yours any bigger." Flash's mouth opened and closed. No one had dared to talk back to him before.

(I'm stealing this from someone)

"Roses are red," Ned whispered to Peter. "Cactus are prickly. It may be just me, but that escalated quickly."

Peter snorted and turned to stare out the window.

In no time, they were unloading the bus in front of the Avengers Tower. Peter sighed and trudged inside.

A cheerful intern with sea green eyes and black hair greeted them. "Hello, Midtown! My name is Percy and I will be your tour guide today.." He started to pass out white passes. "These are your passes. Lose them and goodbye!"

"Sir, what do the numbers mean?" Cindy asked, pointing to a blocky number in the left hand corner of her pass.

"Good question. You guys have level one badges, meaning you have no access to anything unless a level four or higher buzzes you through. Level two and three are mostly for newer interns. Level four is for tour guides, like me. Level five is for the staff such as janitors and secretaries. Level six is for the Avengers' family and rare visiting Avengers such as King T'Challa or the Guardians. Level seven is for the Avengers. Finally, level eight is for Mr. Stark and his family," Percy explained.

One by one, the students swiped their passes(Flash going first). Eventually it was Peter's turn. He didn't even need a badge so he walked right through the scanner.

"Peter Rogers-Stark,Level Eight. Welcome back Peter. It's refreshing to see you use this entrance and not the window on the ninetieth-" the AI chirped.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. mute!" Peter yelped. Murmurs broke out among the high school students.

"Well then, right this way," Percy announced.

*time skippity skip skip one hour. This is Chloe, she likes Joe*

The tour was going okay until they visited the training room.

"Oh Peter! What a surprise!" Clint called, putting up a terrible facade. Peter swore under his breath. Of course.

"Come spar!"

"Hmmm, let me think about it"--he tapped his chin--"no."

"Aw cmonnnn!" Clint whined.

"No."

"Fiiine, but guess who's flying in today?!" Clint wiggled his eyebrows. Peter mentally prepared himself. "The Guardians!"

The class was extremely confused at this point.

"Sir!" Flash piped up, being the idiot he was. "Do you know penis Parker?"

Clint's expression turned cold. He walked out  without another word.

Welp, he's gonna die.

Good morning/night/evening/day/eternal abyss!