"Who am I?
My shadow is getting bigger on this path of stardom. One day it will catch me and make me fear the spotlights. I fear one day I will crash and burn to ashes. I am tired but I cannot stop. Where on this path can I finally rest?"
- Kim Na...
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At the party, Ha Yun found herself constantly on the lookout for Namjoon. Her interaction with him earlier, sparked worries. When he was chatting and laughing with other people, she wondered if he was truly happy. Sometimes, he was genuinely happy interacting with people, but after the conversation died, she saw a flicker of sadness in his expression.
Then, he was off again to find other people to distract himself with. Her heart throbbed looking at him in this state, and she carried the dull ache along as she interacted with the party guests. As she moved on from one conversation to the next, her eyes kept glancing at his face, trying to read his moods.
She sighed and shook her head. She was right to feel worried.
The interactions he fully immersed himself with at the party were only shots of anesthetic.
She was reminded of how the current world works. Everyone seemed to know that they were missing something but instead of searching for the answer within themselves and in nature, they chose the shortcuts the world had advertised.
Shortcuts that promised instant escape, bliss and happiness. As the world took another dose of the anesthetic they numb their own souls. When the high was over, the world realized that they needed another dose. A higher dose.
This cycle repeated in an endless loop of self torture until they murdered their own souls and themselves afterwards. Some with stronger souls might get saved by their own souls but that was rare.
Soo-Jin's soul was too young and frail to save her from herself. Ha Yun's breath hitched as a hard lump replaced the dull ache. With her eyes closed, she fought against the guilt and helpless feeling trying to invade the peace of her soul.
She opened her eyes to search for an escape but as the party was in its full swing, the real world had become too much for her. The lights, sounds, people, conversation and emotions swirled around her leaving her breathless. The real world was not helping to protect her soul from her own shadows. Her legs instinctively carried her to the exit escaping to the world of solitude. Her own world.
As she left the main hall room to the empty dim lit balcony, the noise disappeared and the swirling intruding sensations lost their grip on her. She was free again.
The balcony was lit up only by the full moon light. It had been a long time since she had looked up to the moon and admired its beauty, grandeur and also its loneliness.
She didn't realize someone was approaching until a heady scent pulled her out from her reverie. The corner of her lips lifted up into a smile. She breathed in deeply and appreciated the calming effect it had on her.
"Hi, Namjoon." she said without turning around.
(WORD COUNT: 462)
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AUTHOR'S NOTE:
*** Do you enjoy going for parties? What do you like most about it?
***What do you think about the anesthetic shots concept?
***If you like this chapter please comment and vote. Thanks :-)
UPDATE 28/8/2020 -Edited the chapter length into two chapters
