Night Train || cth

f o r t y - t w o

5, 4, 3, 2, 1...
Happy New Year!

Or better known as the famous countdown followed by the three well known words shouted by millions around the world. Every year this is the same tradition - 365 days pass, all leading up to the awaited dropping of the ball in Times Square. People line up hours ahead of time, some even the day prior. All of them hoping to check off the experience from their bucket list.

Families, friends, couples, and even strangers align the streets of New York City as they write their final chapter of a book that's taken all year to write. Some of their previous chapters may have experienced triumph or failure, love or loss, happiness or sadness, but in the end all that matters is the person they've become after it all. They could be the same exact person as the year before or maybe they're an entirely new person - each and every human being is completely different.

For me, I like to think that I've become an entirely different person. I've experienced many different journeys this year, and because of them I've become stronger than I ever imagined possible.

I could recollect on all of them, but I think there's one that stands out again all the rest, and he's standing right next to me, holding tightly into my hand as if he'll never let go. And truth be told, I don't want him to.

I never could've imagined that I'd stumble across him in a million years. I certainly never thought I'd meet him in the one place that was meant to be shared with another - a secret hideaway for him and I.

A secret hideaway that became more of a sanctuary with this once dark haired stranger than it ever was with the blonde haired heartbreaker.

He turned out to be everything I ever needed without even realizing it.

To make it even better, I turned out to be the same exact thing for him. Just as I had, he too loved another who double crossed him. A girl who had no intention of catching him after he fell. She was only worried about herself and never cared about the consequences.

We had been stuck in situations that we didn't even know weren't meant to be. Everyday we went along with the thought that they were the ones for us. They were the ones that would love us until the very end. That is until they took our hearts between their fingers and crushed them into dust, sprinkling the remains onto the cold, hard floor beneath their feet.

I guess there was some kind of irony in the situation that they would find each other. The two heartbreakers coming together to end up tearing each other apart like they did us.

That's the bad and interesting irony of it, but ours is the good and amazing type. The chances of us coming together to patch up the scars laid upon our hearts seemed impossible, but I guess it was all planned out for us by greater forces.

In just a short amount of time he has become the most important aspect of my life. He's the smile on my face, the butterflies in my stomach, and the thoughts in my head. There is never a dull moment when I'm with him and no matter what kind of struggle we faced, we always overcame them with each other by our side.

When I jeopardized our relationship by allowing Luke to cloud my senses, I was certain that I had lost him forever. The time spent away from him was agonizing and I never want to have to go through it again. I never want to cause him any pain like I did that day because seeing him sad is the worst. It's as though I had stolen the sun from the rest of the world, and more importantly mine.

It might sound cheesy but he is truly the one who brightens my day, so therefore he is my sunshine. Whatever dark time I was trapped in, he was there to make it disappear.

My ultimate darkness was the anniversary of Abby's death, and even though I wanted nothing to do with anybody, he insisted to stay and help me. He stayed with me for the entire night and soothed me throughout my nightmares.