Strings of Regret

Chapter 4

I had second thoughts on telling them about this. Not because I don't trust them but because I don't know how they'll react to the sudden news. Both Sabrina and Cassi saw how hurt I was when Reese stopped talking to me. Hindi ako nasaktan sa mababaw na dahilan na crush ko siya at hindi na niya ako pinapansin. Nasaktan ako dahil naging kaibigan ko rin naman siya at may pinagsamahan na rin naman kami. I can say that the girls are enough but I can't deny that having a guy friend is different. There is a quite big difference. Iba ang dating kapag may kaibigan kang lalaki. Its like, in some aspects, they are full of surprises because you don't know how their mind works and that adds up to the fun. They are not like girls na you will have the idea kung ano at paano sila mag-isip. Having Reese as a friend taught me that a guys perception is far different from ours.

I waited for an answer from them but nothing came so I continued.

"He apologized for what he did and properly explained his side," I trailed off.

Sabrina remained looking at me before speaking. "You're happy right?"

I nodded. I know what they're thinking. Masaya sila para sakin pero hindi nila maiwasang mag-alala. As I said, they saw how hurt I was. Hindi man halata kasi I pretended that everything was fine. They knew that I was the kind of person that gets attached easily kaya when people leave, one of my fears will come to life. I still am confused whether I will changed that attitude or not? Should I remain attached to people and accept the fact that not everyone stays? Or should I change that to avoid the excruciating pain it gives me when they leave?

"If you're happy, then..." said Sabrina then looked at Cassi. Cassi blinked twice like she was in daze before speaking.

"That's what matters most," she smiled genuinely. I smiled because of what she said. I am so lucky to have them.

Days pass like a whirlwind and now it's finally March. Half day lang kami ngayon kasi mamayang hapon gaganapin ang recognition day. I already asked mom to attend it at kunin ang card ko. I told her before hand to not expect too much. Hindi kasi kami ininform kung sino-sino ang mga top achievers ngayon. So I had to tell her na kahit achiever ako noon it doesn't mean ganon parin ngayon but surprisingly she assured me that it's alright if ever I'm out of the list. She said she knew I'm doing my best and that is enough for her. How I love my mom.

When the bell rang we immediately went out. Hindi kami makakakain nina Cassi at Sabrina ng sabay dahil uuwi kami sa kanya kanya naming tahanan para makasabay mamaya sa aming mga magulang.

"Kita kits nalang mamaya. Ingat!" I said to the girls and waved them goodbye, they did the same.

Kasalukuyan akong nakasakay sa tricycle ngayon papunta sa amin. When I saw our house nearing I called out to the driver.

"Manong dito lang po!" sabay abot sa aking bayad.

I opened our gate and went inside. Mama was already there, sitting on the sofa with her laptop placed on the table infront of her. Dad was at work so doon na siya kumakain nang lunch sa workplace nila while Renan was at school, sa school kung saan nagtatrabaho si mama, nagbabaon lang siya nang lunch para hindi na umuwi. Ganon rin naman dapat si Mama but she purposely went home today kasi nga card day ko. She's still on her uniform and she's wearing her glasses.

"Ma nandito na 'ko," I said while taking my shoes off and putting my backpack down.

"Hmm. Kumain ka na. Susunod ako," she replied without giving me a single glance. She's currently reading something in her laptop with her forehead creased.

I walked near her and glanced on her laptop. I saw many columns with names on the other side and in the other column was all numbers. Probably her pupils grades and all. Oh right! Bukas na rin ang card day nila. "Sabay na tayo. Its past 12 ma. Malilipasan ka."