another love; harry potter

thirty

\ wherein he admits it /

"WAKE UP!" SHOUTED several voices. I jolted up to see Hermione, Harry, and Ron hovering over me, panting heavily and staring at me. 

"What is your problem?" I groaned, "I was sleeping very unpeacefully, thanks. Hang on." I frowned, realizing Harry and Ron were there, "how the hell did you two get into the girls dorms?"

"We're not in the girls dorms," said Harry, gently sliding my glasses onto my face. He sighed and lay down beside me in my cot, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. 

"Good morning," Ron muttered, sitting down in a chair beside my bed. "We're in the hospital wing."

"What? Why?" I asked, looking around, before wincing and holding up a hand to my head, suddenly feeling it ache. "What happened?"

"Well, I told your friends, here, to not wake you up because it could have hurt your brain in some severe and unfixable way-" started Madam Pomfrey disapprovingly as Ron waved her off.

"She was having such a bad nightmare that she couldn't wake up from that she had to go to the Hospital Wing for, the least we could do was stop the nightmare!"

"Pheobe," said Madam Pomfrey instead, turning to me, "have you ever had nightmares this bad before?" Harry and Ron rolled their eyes as if they knew the answer, and assumed it was no, but I hesitated as Hermione shot me a look. 

"Er...yes," I said finally, swallowing anxiously and avoiding Ron and Harry's gazes. 

"I see," she said slowly. "And have you been able to wake up by yourself, or is there someone who has to help?"

"Er. Hermione wakes me up." I said shortly. 

"So this has happened multiple times?" She pressed. 

"Almost...almost every night," Hermione said, the both of us knowing that at this point, the nightmares got so bad sometimes I just wouldn't go to bed and be dead tired throughout the day.

Although, it was never bad enough to go to the Hospital Wing for.

"I see..." Madam Pomfrey repeated. "Stay here for the night," she said, "I want to keep you here, maybe the weekend. I'll give you a calming drought, too, that ought to make your nightmares go away." She disappeared back into her office promptly. 

There was silence when she left- you could probably hear a pin drop. Ron and Harry were frowning at me as I avoided their gazes, and Hermione was focusing on a book, handing me one as well just in case I needed something to distract myself with. 

"So," Ron began crossly. "Every night? You've been having nightmares every night that you can't wake yourself up from? And you didn't think either of us would care? Both of you?"

"Don't rope Hermione into this," I said, picking up the book and flipping through the pages absentmindedly. "I made her swear not to tell you."

"Right," Ron said. "And why's that, pray tell?"

"Look, it's not a big deal," I said finally, "it's only nightmares. Why do you care?"

"Why do we care," Ron laughed scornfully. 

"Yeah, that's a bloody good question, I'll give you that, Pheobe," Harry spoke up finally. 

"Thank you! Hermione, stop elbowing me-"

"Really bloody good question," Harry clenched his jaw and met my gaze tensely. "Pheobe, how do you not get it by now? I want to be there when you're going through something, I don't want you to have to go through anything alone, I don't want you to force yourself to hide your emotions or yourself from me, of all people! I want to always be there for you no matter what, and I can't do that for you if you keep hiding everything from me, Pheobe! I want to be your number one person, the person you'll always go to if you ever need a single damn thing, because I fucking love you!"