Doctor ~ G.Blythe [1]

ninety-two.

+ flames +

I sat on the top of one of the logs surrounding the fire, my elbows on my knees as I leaned forward staring ahead of me into the flickering flames as I took in deep breaths. My eyes were barely focusing properly, falling out and in of clarity as I tried to pull my head into the right space, which was much harder than it sounded. Gilbert stood as he paced around, his hands in front of him as he rambled on, which he had been doing for a while now, even though I hadn't exactly been listening.

"Then we had cigars and whiskey together" Gilbert said, letting out a deep sigh as he put one hand on his forehead, turning on his heel and walking back towards me. "Honeslty, i'm not a fan of either of them but I wasn't going to turn down the man of the house when he offers me a cigar that's just rude" he added way too quickly, the words falling from his mouth before i could even pick up the ones he had just said, my head hurting as I closed my eyes tightly for a moment, trying to regain myself. "Or  i'm assuming I haven't really had anyone offer me a chat before" Gilbert added, taking a break as he took I some rushed breaths, making me rest my cheek in my hand as I looked up at him, my eyebrows scrunched as I hoped he would stop talking soon.

"Gilbert" I said, my voice scratchy as I contemplated that it was even mines, the boy ignoring me as he started talking once again. "And that made me pretty scared because I had never even tasted a cigar before and now I was about to smoke one" he stumbled as I let out a sigh, straigining my back as I slapped my hands on my thighs. "Gilbert" I said much more forcefully, Gilbert finally turning around to look at me as he dropped his arms down by his side in defeat. "I am struggling to keep up with you on this one" I told him, shaking my head as I pushed my hair behind my ears, motioning behind me to where everyone was still cheering and drinking, not doing anything in particular.

"I've had a lot of" I started, closing my mouth immediately as I threatened to throw up, and last time that wasn't a very pleasant experience. "I can tell" Gilbert finished for me, making my sigh as I shook my head, covering my mouth as I looked back up at him quickly. "Don't shame me" I told him, clearing my throat as I hunched forward a little bit, trying desperately to keep everything I had drunk down. "Just speak slower" I told himself Gilbert kicking the leaves on the ground lazily as he took his hat off of his head, setting it on one of the logs. "And maybe a bit more to the point" I added as he nodded his head, letting out a sigh as he looked down at me with his mouth pressed into a straight line.

"Yeah you're right, sorry" he said quietly, as he cleared his throat, his breathing still ragged and panicked as I smiled at him, nodding my head slowly. "Just take a deep breath, and tell me what happened" I said to him, feeling bad that I had snapped at him, realising that he was just flustered over what he's trying to say. "Okay" he said as he took in a deep breath, standing on the spot as he pushed his hands into the pockets of his trousers, staring down at me as I blinked a few times, running my tongue over my dry and cracked lips. "Her father laid it out on a silver platter" he told me, letting out his breath as neither of us spoke for a split second.

"Laid what our on a platter?" I asked him, even though I had a feeling that I already knew what he was talking about, needing some confirmation. "The Sorbonne. Paris. The money to do it all" he listed, the brown haired boy's eyebrows knitting together as he diverted his eye contact with me for a moment. "My future if I want it" Gilbert added quietly, rubbing his lips together as the fire crackled in front of us in the dead of night. "Permission to propose" he finished as I let out a silent breath, the words slapping me in the face like a strike from a palm.

There it was. Confirmation that Gilbert had the chance to propose to Winifred.

My heart strings pulled as he sat down with a heavy sigh, shaking his head as he leaned forward on his knees with his elbows. "I don't know what to do" he told me as he looked over at me, half of his face being lit up by the warm glows of the flames, his brown eyes burning into my soul. "You don't want to be a country doctor" I told him, my throat scratching as i forced the words out, Gilbert automatically looking away as he stared into the fire "It doesn't seem like much of a question, Gilbert" I said, trying to find the crack in what he was wanting me to say and why he was actually here.