Hate into Grace

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Written 3/1/2020 3:25am

I hate this place
The breathless space that I live in
I wish I could kill everything in
It.

Each day that passes
I grow more impatient
Just to burn it all to the ground
Charred embers all around.

I hate the sound.
I hate the feeling
Of being hopeless to change
It.

I'd strangle the next person
I saw with the promise
To end it all.
To no longer stall
And live a life that was
Never meant for me.
Not my destiny.

The pressure following defeat
Can be brutal.
Not frugal in a way
To improve you.
A hellish cruel joke
Turned into a miserable reality.
Such a travesty.

The wish to die
In fallacy.
The peace to no longer
Want to try to change
Acceptably.
The frustration of never being loved
Correctly.

A damaged heart
That no longer beats to live
But just to exist.
A sick tryst of a devil's deal
Never made.
Gods forbade it.
A miracle could erase it...
If the sad truth is finally
Embraced.

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