The Golden Pear [YA - Featured]

♫~Notes 100~♫

 The sun outside hid behind heavy clouds as if they reflected Mr. Kamini-san's inner mind.

"There is nothing I can do now. Only to believe in you, my dearest child."

In an attempt to distract himself, his tired, red eyes trailed to the pile of books. Taking the first one, he checked the cover and the story at the back. Finding it's the third book in the series, he listed the "Story so Far" section and got a summary of the previous books.

Jerking his head after reading the few first sentences, the book had fallen out of his hand. With a blunt thud, it had landed, sprawling on the floor.

"Oh, my. What a klutz am I." He hid his surprise behind the smile. "The age must be catching up with me faster than I thought. It feels like yesterday when I cradled you for the first time. You can't remember, but you were the smallest of your siblings."

He lifted the book and placed it back.

"But the fun fact is, you have grown the most, with Ri being the smallest of you. I'm sure you don't remember, but Ai used to be chubby as a baby. Ri had never cried until something big bothered him."

He shook his head as he was reminiscent.

"Thinking about it now, it signaled how serious he would be. But I have my part in this too. I should have never pushed him so much into studies. Your school year should be enough. Summer should be a time for fun and not to be locked in the house with a homeroom teacher. I've made a mistake."

He watched Kagetsu's serene face. Only a breeze played with his hair. The nurse entered the room, giving Mr. Kamini a quick nod. The dark clouds outside promised storm, and so she went to close all windows.

"I should go." He stood up, his joints cracking. "I may not be made of sugar, but my old bones don't like getting soaked." He leaned forward and kissed Kagetsu's forehead. "No matter what dream you have, don't forget the wonderful people who are waiting for you here."

As he was straightening, he paused, his eyes widening once more. His gaze locked onto his son's face, but nothing change. More tears came to play outside.

'My mind must be playing with me.' He turned around, leaving with the nurse. Perhaps it was his imagination playing a trick on him to hear Kagetsu's voice. Maybe his tired eyes from the restless night as he hurried to see his child, made up that twitch of gentle fingers.

However, Kagetsu remained sleeping beauty.

\\_(''>_<'')_//

During the evening, Rigaku borrowed the first volume of that light novel. Tucking inside the sleeping bag, he tried not to think about the empty space next to him.

Ignoring the disappointed voice telling him he was meant to read high literature and scientific studies, he opened it, reading it word by word. Occasionally, he would stop, absorbing the paragraph or two.

The writing style was simple, but he figured the story was aimed at younger readers as the characters were easy to read and were among the most common ones used. The same went for the sentence structure.

Before long, he finished two books in less than an hour. The story wasn't unpredictable, neither too simplistic, and he found a certain enjoyment inside. Perhaps the pictures inside helped.

'Now I see why Kagetsu is so absorbed in this book. The main heroine goes through a magical transformation that leaves her trapped inside a man's body. Yet she remains a girl in her heart, so she can't control whom she falls in love with.'

He adjusted his glasses, noticing Freya and his brother were going to sleep.

'However, for anybody else, she is a boy, so for her to fall in love with the pack leader is very problematic.' He closed the book, placing it next to his head. 'Wait! Should I call her -she- or -he- since she is a boy, but actually not since she is still a girl...'

He ruffled his hair as the spiral of thoughts tried to get out of control. 'Would "it" do? No, you baka! She isn't a thing! But that's neutral, right? However, it doesn't feel right.' As if writing in the air, his index finger moved, drawing invisible diagrams.

'The pronoun "they" should fit here the best, but that can be confusing, as it's normally used for multiple people. I wonder if there are any other pronouns.'

He let his hand land on his chest. A stray tear had slid down his cheek, thankfully, on the side away from others.

'I don't know... the answer...' Clenching his teeth, he gripped the sleeping bag. 'No wonder Ka panicked and cried so much. He doesn't know who he is! He isn't fully boy, neither girl. It's like dusk and dawn. There isn't enough darkness to call it a night. Nor the right amount of sunlight to recognize it as a day.'

Taking a few breaths, he had calmed down.

'In my LGBT+ research, I had read about non-binary people. If Ka doesn't feel to be a girl inside his heart, he could also be partly non-binary and not only a transgender. I shall talk about this with him later. He already has enough on his plate.'

His eyes trailed to the empty spot next to him. From the movements of the others, he guessed neither of them slept, full of restless thoughts. The invisible weight on their back kept pressing them to the point of bending them.

He retracted his gaze toward the ceiling, taking down his glasses. 'I need to stay strong for Ka.' He placed his finger on the bandaged arm. 'He needs all the support he can get. I don't have time to waste on an insignificant matter like my health.'

The face of his frowning youngest sibling appeared in front of him.

'And if I don't watch myself, he would chew me.' The corners of his lips rolled up a bit after a long time. Drifting into sleep didn't take that long, but his dream hardly gave him any energy to face tomorrow.

"I expected more," a voice laced with ice had spoken.