Great Loss (a hotchniss story)

anger (emily's POV)

London's perfect. Amongst the chaos that happened 2 weeks ago, this is my home.

When Elle goes to work, I roam around London. I go sightseeing and eat amazing food. But it's kind of lonely.

"Hey, Em. I wanted to talk to you about something." Elle says, passing me some ice cream.

"Sure, what's up?" I say.

She sighs, "Okay since there's a baby on the way, and I promised myself that I'm not letting you take care of this baby yourself. So..." Elle pauses. "I was thinking we could get a place together. 3-4 bedroom maybe."

I look up and smile. "Elle we don't have to do that. I mean that's gonna cost a lot."

"No I know, but it would be our home. I can sell this house and you don't have to live in the other house anymore. You haven't even unpacked," she explains.

She's right. I haven't unpacked. I don't know why. Maybe it'll feel too real. But me being here is already real.

"You know what, you're right. I want my baby to be in a good environment. And Elle you don't have to do this. I can handle a baby on my own. I'm a single mom," I express.

She laughs. "No you can't. You're going to be working for Interpol, plus the baby being awake most of the night. And you have to feed her and watch her 24/7. A mom shouldn't have to go through that alone," Elle says.

She's right again. My mom went through that. Now look, I barely even talk to her. I don't want that to happen with me and my baby. Especially since I won't let him/her know who her father is.

"Okay then, let's buy a place!" I shout. Elle comes up and hugs me.

We pull away. "You know you have to tell Walker tomorrow when we have that meeting."

"I know, there's a lot of things I need to tell him, come with me?" I ask.

She plops down onto the couch. "Obviously b****."

"Hey, hey, no cussing. If I can't cuss then you can't either!" I object.

"Fine. But once the baby's out, we're drinking wine, while you're in the hospital," Elle laughs.

"I can't do that, I'm planning on breastfeeding," I reply.

"You're no fun," Elle complains. "It's getting a little late. You need sleep. And I... I need it too."

"You're no fun. Tell me something about yourself that no one else knows. And I'll go to sleep," I argue.

Elle sighs, "Fine." She hesitates. "I used to have a crush on someone at the BAU." I gasp. "But I won't tell you who it is." And she walks away.

"Are you serious? You can't leave me hanging like that Elle Greenaway!" I shout. I hear her door close and I turn off the lights. I walk to my room. It's a mess.

I go to my place every now and then to get some clothes. I've been staying in Elle's guest room for the past couple weeks. I turn off the lights and I get into bed. I doze off...

All of a sudden I hear banging on the door. "Emily! Emily!" a voice shouts.

"What the hell? It's too early for this."

I open the door. It's Elle. "Elle, it's too early for this."

"What do you mean, it's 8:30. The meeting starts in an hour! I'm already dressed, hurry up!" She says.

"Hold on," I dash to the bathroom and I throw up. I didn't know she followed me.

"Here, let me hold your hair. Your morning sickness is out of control!" Elle yells.