Sweetest Amore

O T T O

I was awoken by a strong feeling of nausea. Quickly I jumped out of the bed and dashed into the bathroom. Bending over the toilet seat I emptied my stomach.

Wiping my mouth with the back of my hand I stood up and walked to the sink washing my hands and mouth. Taking deep breaths I looked at myself in a mirror.

I looked paler than usual, which probably have some kind of connection with the fact that I'm in Italy. I mean it's different air, different weather in comparison with Croatia, well with Zagreb. But that is also because of this little bundle that I'm carrying.

Instinctively I put a hand over my little bump making a smile stretch across my face. 'I'm getting fatter.' I frowned at the thought but quickly shook my head. I don't want to think about it, not again. I don't want to do to myself the same thing that my parents do. I don't want to feel useless or fat or ugly.

'I'm gonna be a mom. I need to get myself together. Even if I don't remember what happened through the last four years and who the father is. I need to get myself in order, not for me but my baby. I don't want to be like my parents, I want to be better, a real parent. The one that will be with you no matter what, through thick and thin.'

I still remember the day when the doctor told me that I'm pregnant, that I'm expecting a little bundle of joy. I was scared shirtless.

Flashback

I was not feeling alright for a while now,  ever since I came from the hospital. I thought that it had something with me feeling nervous and anxious because I couldn't remember or recognize anything. So at first, I didn't want to tell anything to Daniel but he caught me throwing up this morning.

"How long do you feeling like this?" He asked as he sat next to me extending a glass of water to me.

"Ever since I exited the hospital." I said silently while looking at the floor. I could feel his burning glare at my face.

"Why didn't you tell me anything?" He asked with sadness and anger in his voice.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to be a burden to you." I exclaimed seeing his face softens "I know that you worry about me because of my memory so I didn't want to add on it. And besides, I thought that it was a bug or because of my feelings that are switching every second. At a moment I'm anxious than nervous and all that because I'm overthinking again." I added with a small smile.

Sighing he rubbed his hand against his chin "I'm not mad at you. And you aren't and never will be a burden to me. You are my little sister and I would like it if you tell me if something is bothering you or if you are in pain or.. basically everything. Okay?" He asked and I nodded my head.

"Okay then. Umm, you said that you are throwing up since you returned here, right?"

"Yeah." I answered fidgeting with my fingers.
"That's not normal. It can't be normal, so can you get dressed I'm gonna take you to the hospital." He said making me sigh heavily.