What If? (BoyxBoy)

CHAPTER TWO

"Saan tayo pupunta?" I asked him as we enter his car.

"Your call." He answered.

"Tagaytay, kaya mo?" I suggested - still considering if he can. Baka kasi inaantok na pala siya at hindi niya na kayaning maglong drive.

"Exactly what I'm thinking."

He started driving. Walang nagsalita sa aming dalawa habang binabaybay namin ang daan patungong Tagaytay.

Maya-maya lang ay hindi niya na napigilang magsalita.

"Sorry, Pat." He sounded so apologetic.

"Para saan?" I curiously asked. Wala naman siyang ginawa para magsorry.

"That night, Zeke told us na hindi mo siya pinayagan kasi babe time. Of course, we made fun of him. Sa amin kasi, he's the only one who has a love life so we called him names. Guilt trips here and there. Masyado na kasi naming namiss kaibigan namin, eh." He explained smiling while remembering that night. "We were happy that night because he came. Sabi pa niya, maaga siyang uuwi kasi kahit napapayag ka na, ayaw niyang maghintay ka nang ganoon katagal." Muli ay pumatak ang luha ko.

He's been nothing but a good boyfriend to me. Madalas ko siyang pinapayagan to do his things because I trust him so much.

Trust. He never dared to break it. Kahit maluwag naman talaga sa loob kong payagan siya, he always made sure na hindi ako maiiwan nang matagal. He always made sure na hindi ako mag-iisip kung nasaan siya o kung ano nang nangyayari sa kanya. He's always considering my feelings. Ayaw niyang maramdaman kong hindi ako mahalaga sa kanya.

Not until that night. I knew there was something wrong kasi hindi siya nagtetext sa akin. But I convinced myself. Pinilit kong isipin na baka napasaya lang sila nang sobra sa bonding nila kaya hindi na siya nakapagtext sa akin and that was okay. That was the first time na inumaga na siya nang uwi and still, that was okay. I was okay. Akala ko kasi, kaibigan pa niya ang mga kasama niya sa oras na iyon. And I never dared to ask. Ganoon ko siya pinagkakatiwalaan kaya sobrang nadurog ako when he told me that he got a girl pregnant.

"Sobrang hyper namin that night. We confiscated all our phones para walang makaabala sa bonding namin kasi that was the only time na nakumpleto kami. Ang saya namin. Sobrang daming nainom kaya sobrang nalasing. Hindi na rin namin alam kung anong nangyari kaya sorry, Pat."

I can only imagine what happened that night. I wasn't even there to visualize everything but if there is one thing that I'm certain, hindi sinasadya ni Zeke kung ano mang nangyari that night.

"Wala kang dapat ihingi ng sorry, Von. Walang may gustong mangyari 'yon. Kahit si Zeke, kahit si Gwen." We were all victims here. Sobrang lala maglaro ng tadhana. "Biktima lang din sila."

"Tangina, Pat. Ang swerte ni Zeke sa 'yo. You are one of the most understanding people I know. Hindi mo deserve masaktan nang ganito." He said while looking sorry for my situation. Naaawa. Pero sino bang hindi maaawa sa sitwasyon ko? Kulang na lang yata'y gawing commercial ng Jollibee ang love story namin ni Zeke.

"Sshh." I stopped him. "Stop feeding my pain. Baka umiyak lang ako nang umiyak dito."

"Ang tagal mong pinigilan 'yang mga luha na 'yan. Let yourself cry it all out. Hindi mo kailangang habambuhay dibdibin kung ano mang iniinda mo ngayon."