Our Treasurous Love

Chapter 5: If

My mom was tired so I think I will just go out on my own now. I don't have many friends to call so... I will treat myself to the arcade. They said it's fun

°•○

Wahhh!! I never have been here. I want to try new things but I was amazed at the Dance machine?? If that's what it is called. I inserted coins and started playing on my own. I just got bored for the first round so I went for a stroll yo see more games

Then I spot a VCR. I was about to enter but there's a familiar voice that I heard inside. I took a peek and it was him, Sunghoon... I think he's enjoying himself so I might as well go.

"Oppa!" That made me turned around and look closer at that girl

She's pretty

"Yah! How come?! You're afraid of VCR's??" She punched him like it was just like they're friends or something

I can't breathe... I felt like my chest was crumbling my heart into pieces

I drag myself to a music booth and locked the door, just playing the background music without singing the lyrics

I stayed there for hours until I cleared my mind. It's my fault... if only I shouldn't have left him behind years ago

I walk out of the place, keeping my head down, and suddenly bump someone that hard that I can also feel the pain on my forehead

"Are you okay?" He said

I look at him and in my surprise, I saw Sunghoon looking at me with those eyes. That gaze where only he can look at me like that, the gaze where his eyes were just like the universe and now all I can see is his feeling of longing ness

His hand was shaking, and just can't believe that I came back

"Jayviee?" He asked

I kept my head down and was about to run in the other direction but he holds on to my hand tightly that I wouldn't escape

"I can't... I can't let you go" he said "for the second time... I will hold on to you" his voice was dark and shallow

I'm doomed... I got caught

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"Why didn't you show up to me when you arrived here??" He asked

"I did" I replied coldly

I need to act cold for him to let go of me

"Or even call"

"I can't.. Your phone was off" I just need to continue playing

"Have you eaten?" He asked me again

"Ahh.. Yes" I smiled awkwardly

"Then can I at least accompany you home?"

"I am sorry.. I need to attend a special event that is pretty much close here" I smiled, I picked up my bag and was ready to go

"You're still the Jayviee I know right?" He said in a cold tone

"I am sorry but the Jayviee you once loved was long gone... I am not that old nice, happy and stupid Jayviee before. I have improved since I went abroad" I replied

Was I too harsh on him??

"Jayv---"

"You're an idol... I don't want to get involved in your matters. Please just refrain from knowing me?? It hurts my private life"

I am really harsh but I just need to say the words I really don't mean. I want him to move on and just fulfill his dreams and I will also do the same thing... for my mom

I walk away from him for the second time, the words that I really don't mean, and the decisions I really regret everything

If only I just stayed by his side. If only I.. argh!

My tears were about to drop but I need to go now.

I was walking along the streets and suddenly bumped into someone, I just don't know who he is but I spilled coffee on his shirt which is why I am a bit embarrassed

"Are you okay?" I asked him

"I am okay" he smiled sweetly at me. 

"Omo~ What can I do??? I need to repay you for this" I told him 

"Hmm... how about giving me your number?" he suddenly asked "Maybe... you can just treat me for dinner" He again smiled and it actually made me feel at ease now.

"Sure"

"Then see you... My bus is already here" he said

we are actually at the same age but by the looks of it, I think he graduated early and have a job. I just need to repay him and it's all over... right?

I just waited for the bus to come and take me to a very far place to sort out all my thoughts. 

-_-_-_-_-_-_

"Eomma! I am home" I shouted

"Yah! Where did you go???" she said grabbing me in my shoulders "You!! argh!!! You got me so worried," she said and hug me

"Eomma~ I can take care of myself... I just went to get some air. I just want to sort my mind" I told her and just go to the kitchen together

"Is there something troubling you?" My mom asked and I just lowered my head, she brushed my hair over and over "It's okay... whatever it is... It is okay my baby" she said

"Eomma~ Sunghoon saw me," I told her

"What did you do?" she asked

"I said some words that I didn't mean... I was too harsh with him." I told her

"It's okay... it is better that way. If the reports will saw you, you know what happens to his career. It will be the cause of their group's downfall. You did the right thing my daughter" She said as she never stops brushing my hair

"I regret everything eomma~" I wipe my tears "I regret the decision I made years ago... If only I just stayed here and be by his side... and I saw his eyes eomma~~~ I can feel the pain in his eyes as soon as he saw me in front of him... he was literally hurt about what I did. I regret everything eommonie~" I told her as I wipe all my tears over and over.