Conflicted (Flip Zimmerman)

34. Winter solstice

*A/N: I originally was going to include this to the last chapter but I didn't want the chapter to drag on... so here's a short chapter to set up for the next. -Ren <3*

Recovery the past week had been a bit stressful. You'd get discouraged or frustrated when you weren't able to do easy things. Like go to the bathroom, bathe, or even walk a couple steps.

There were moments where you couldn't really eat. It became difficult with the antibiotics and the fact that you haven't had a full meal in weeks made it harder. It wasn't until one day, two plates of food were dropped off.

"Two? Why two?" Your voice was almost back to normal.

"One for you and one for me." Flip spoke adjusting his chair in front of you while placing both plates on the tray. "I'd figured it'd be easier to eat together, like how we would before."

"You don't have to do that." You told him, he sighed and gave you a warning look.

"I want to, plus we have lunch dates to make up." Flip grinned at you.

He never missed a meal with you, he'd always make sure to be there. You knew he did it so you didn't feel forced to eat. He made it feel like a normal thing to do again.

Flip made it easier, if it wasn't for him you'd probably still struggle with the simplest things. But that didn't mean he didn't annoy you.

He'd hold you in his arms when you felt tired from the walk you two would go on. You would unbutton his shirt and stroke his chest with your finger tips. Slowly making your way to his belt buckle. Right as you were about to undo his belt, he gently grabs your hand.

"What do you think you are doing?" Flip asked in a stern voice.

"Um..nothing." You felt embarrassed that he rejected your touch. Not wanting to look up at him, you just tucked your head into his chest.

"Just get some rest." That was all he said, you felt uneasy, so you forced yourself to go to sleep.

What else could you have done? You felt hurt with his response and you didn't really feel like confronting him about it. For one, you didn't have the energy and maybe it was for the best.

That's how it's been the past week, you'd drop subtle hints at him. Flip would either ignore them or was clueless about it.

You will never forget the first time he helped you shower, the look on his face said it all. Looking at your reflection reminded you how horrible you looked. The way he bathed you, was so platonic. Like he didn't even want you anymore. You understood that you were still recovering but at least display some type of affection. Flip didn't even notice your mood change afterwards which irritated you even more. At this point you were willing to let a CNA bathe you instead.

It wasn't till days later Flip noticed you've been snappier than normal.

"Let me help you," Flip said, rushing to your side, you limped to the bathroom.

"I'm fine, I need to do it on my own." You grumbled, entering the bathroom. Not even look back at his reaction, you started to undress yourself.

"Darlin' let me help you, you're going to get dizzy." Flip warned you, his frustration was clear in his tone.

"I said I got it," you grumbled, throwing your shirt to the floor. You started to feel dizzy and your vision was blurred. You leaned against the wall to support yourself.

"Damn it, woman. Why don't you just listen to me?" Flip wrapped your left hand in plastic, so your bandages didn't get wet.

We waited a moment until you felt more stable. You didn't argue with him when he helped you into the shower. As his large hands roamed your body with soap, you leaned into his touch. Trying to encourage his movements but that didn't work.