Choosing

t h i r t y s e v e n

"That was... interesting," Sara says when we start walking home.

"Mhmm,"

I know we need to talk. I just don't know where to start.

"I'm uh, I'm sorry. For everything." She mutters.

"Me too, but," I glance at her. "You were right about me having my little pity party. It's just I felt like you were replacing me. It took me back to when my dad left and I guess I-"

"You pushed me away before I could leave?" She finishes my sentence for me, and I nod. "You know I never left you, right? Even though we weren't talking I still kept an eye on you."

"Yeah, I know." I roll my eyes playfully. "You were always there."

"That's what frien- sisters are for," She gives me a little side hug.

Sisters

I guess you don't have to be blood to be sisters, because she is my family — through and through.

We end up sitting on a bench and she nudges me lightly. "We have a lot more to talk about, but I want to hear about three certain captains. I've been dying to hear about it ever since I caught you making out with one of them."

I cringe at the memory. "Yeah, that was embarrassing."

"Come on," She shakes my shoulders the way she always does and that's the moment I know we'll be alright. Like she said, we have a lot to talk about and a lot of things to get through. But right now, I just want to talk to my best friend about these boys.

"I don't know, it all happened so fast," I shrug and tell her the entire story. From even before our little argument to now.

"I can't believe they all confessed to you and you've been sleeping with Oikawa," She says with wide eyes.

"Key word is sleeping." I emphasize and she giggles. I missed her laugh.

A lot.

I continue, "I just feel like a terrible person. Technically, I'm not cheating or doing anything wrong. But morally, I feel horrible. I mean I feel like I'm stringing these boys along."

She twists her lips. "I get it, I'm in a similar situation."

"What?" I look at her surprised.

"Tendou, Akaashi, and Iwaiziumi are all on my list."

My eyes widen. "Iwa?"

"He's a really good kisser," She tries to hold back her smile. "And our little arguments makes things... interesting to say the least."

I gasp. "Have you guys-"

"No!" She looks at me horrified. "You remember the pact we made when we were ten?"

I smile. "That we'll wait till marriage?"

"Yeah, although that's been really hard to keep lately."

"Tell me about it." I rub my forehead. "I can't believe you were going through the exact same thing I was."

I guess I can be a little selfish at times. She noticed what I was going through, but I never noticed that she was in the same boat. She really is a great friend and I just needed that reminder.

"So who are you going to pick? Because as much as it's fun now, at the end of the day you have to choose."

"Choosing," I sigh. "What a crazy concept."

She nods knowing exactly how I feel. I love that she gets me.

I shrug. "I don't know who to choose. They're all so different. I feel like I can actually talk to Ushijima and he won't judge, Bokuto is pure fun and I love that I can just let go with him and be myself, Oikawa is... Oikawa. He's annoying, but he's always been there for me. Even when I didn't realize it." I throw a hand through my hair. I'm even more confused now than I was starting.

"I don't know if this helps, but I asked about the boys. I wanted to make sure they weren't just playing you, especially Oikawa." She tells me.

"And?"

"And Iwa told me that all of Oikawa's exes broke up with him — not just because of his obsession with vollyeball, but because he always liked you. They just knew."

"What?"

"I know, crazy." She shakes her head in disbelief. "Bokuto has been in love with you since day one, Akaashi told me that he spent the entire month talking about how special you are and how much he feels like he can be himself too. He also spent his entire savings to buy a new phone and to come here. The boy rode five hours on a train."

I smile at that.

She continues, "And Tendou told me that he's never seen Ushijima like this, he's so open and happy in his own way. He was supposed to fake break up with you for the public a few days ago, but he couldn't bring himself to do it."

"So you just confirmed that they all like me. That was really helpful." I say sarcastically and she laughs.

"Yeah, I guess that wasn't as helpful as I thought it'd be."

I laugh. "Well... I don't know. Maybe I do know who I want."

"Really?" She asks.

"Yeah, I'm gonna sleep on it though." I shrug. "What about you?"

"I'm gonna sleep on it too." She nods.

We end up staying on the bench for another twenty minutes, talking about nothing in particular. I missed Sara. Even if I never met any of these boys, I would have still been happy. Sara's my best friend but she's also my sister. I'm glad I finally remember why she's so amazing.

When I get home, my dad stops me. He again brings up me going to California with him. I didn't have it in me to argue, I told him that maybe when the baby is born I'll go for a week or two to help out. He got happy and I went to bed — with a small smile.

The next morning I wake up with an even bigger smile. I know who I want. It's been him all along. I text Sara one simple name and she responds with another name. I smile for her and get dressed.

I have to tell him. Right now.