Under The Moon's Cover

The lost is found

Sorry, I have been absent for a while, 2020 was hard on everyone. I started a new job, was very stressed, and had to deal with my depression, while still taking care of my son. It was rough but I am back and here to finally bring you all the new chapter that I finally finished! I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!

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I hope I'm doing the right thing by going back. What if I'm not needed? What if they already have a plan or made a deal with Thomas, and my return messes it all up for them? What if I can't do this. What if I can't make it right or help, and my least favorite question, what if I'm too late? What if, in all my wallowing and self-pity those I care about were hurt, far worse than I hurt them? So many questions keep running through my mind. There are so many "what if's" and uncertainty, in this last minute, somewhat rash decision. I don't like the unknown at all.

On and on I run. I run toward my fears, toward my doubts. I run until I feel like I can't keep running, then I run some more. We sleep little and run like a bullet. I can't stop for too long for fear of talking myself out of this insane decision. I'll be running right into the heart of danger and I'm not talking about Thomas. Drayche and Kane are probably running laps in the woods waiting for me to return. If I were them I would want to have the chance to avenge Faye and Zander. Seriously what am I doing?

I am just going to make a fool out of myself. I know what a team of two wolves against one is capable of when angered. I have seen the carnage first hand when rouges tried to invade our territory, while my dad was still alpha. I do not wish to be on the receiving end of that blood bath, but am I ready to be if that is the case? Kane and Drayche have every reason to be angered, I don't fault them for that. I promised to keep Faye safe and to take care of her and Zander, and I am the one that broke that promise. I wouldn't blame them if they did take their anger out on me. After all, I deserve it.

Three days have come and gone since I decided to take heed to Czar's words and turn around. Every day is the same, I go back and forth in circles in my mind, doubting my actions and questioning my decisions. I am wasting so much time doing this, I believe I could have already been back by now if it wasn't for my doubt and fears. Today was no different. After coming back to the same conclusion as the past days, I take off running at full speed. I have to try, after all, if I don't who will? I find the stream that I know runs right through where I am going, and drink some water. Resting next to the stream for a little while to recover, I try to think about how to make all of this right. I look at my surroundings, after coming up with a game plan. I see a few familiar landmarks so I know I am right on the edge of the woods I have fled from twice now.

I don't believe I will miss running for a while after I shift back to being human, at least not in these woods. I have come to find these woods dissatisfying to run in, as of late. I lay lurking in the growing shadow of these thick woods in front of me, deciding to take the night to rest and enter them tomorrow. I find a square-like cave to stay in. The walls are made up of two flat boulders jutting up out of the ground in sort of an inward angle, like a triangle with the top cut off about a quarter way down. The makeshift roof is another flat boulder laying over top of the two angled boulders. The rock on top sticks out a little way making an awning high enough to stand under but not fully enclosed by the other boulders.

It is much nicer than most of the places I have slept in, since running away from my pain. I lay in my shelter after hunting down some food and devouring my catch. While thinking about the plan I made, on how to get Drayche and Kane to listen to my side of the story, I heard the telltale sign of rain splashing all around me on the leaf cluttered ground. Luckily my shelter is sturdy and doesn't leak. I am out of the elements, for the most part, for the first time in a while. Lately, I have been sleeping under the open sky so I can watch the moon pass over me.