"Why don't you just leave me alone?" I spit at him, the anger laced in my voice angered him and I loved it. I watched as he clenched his jaw, staring at me as his eyes darkened; walking up to me, soon towering over me making me realize how small I w...
MATTHEO RIDDLE IS @yasmineamaro . CALANTHA, NICCOLÒ, AND KASSANDRA ARE ALL MINE. ALL OTHERS UNLESS MENTIONED ARE JK R*WLINGS.
NEXT CHAPTER WILL HAVE SMUT // THIS CHAPTER DO BE KINDA BORING
TW: SWEARING
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MATTHEO
THE tingling sensation I got when I was near her was slowly fading away, and the constant, overwhelming thought that she might be with someone else slowly became less important to me. No longer was my time spent trying to endure her or her presence, no longer did I waste the early months of my last year at Hogwarts trying to get close to her, and no longer had I wanted to. Instead, I spent the time trying to vigilantly figure out what to tell my Father, how to get him off of my back when he'd be faced with the revelation that I would no longer be continuing the task he'd so honorably given me, and how I was to deal with whatever punishment I would be given so forth.
No longer had I wished to be near her, to watch her talk and smile when looking at the younger years walking by in the hallway. It was happening so fast, the feeling of whatever it was that overtook me when she was near was fading, and it was drawing near being completely gone; I was so thankful. And then I saw her in the corridor, talking to a young dark haired girl, she was bending down to listen to something the young girl was whispering in her ear and I couldn't help but lean against the cold stone barriers of Hogwarts and watch as she tucked a piece of her soft hair behind her ear, her cheeks becoming rosy as she smiled upforth at the young girl, placing a supportive hand on her back and walking further down the corridor with her.
And then my mind traced back to the things I said to her, called her. How I had told her to stop eating and how I knew it would have an impact on her, how I knew so well that she would listen and truly not allow herself food. How I had dishonored her Mother in undeniably putting her faulty on her own daughter, and how she'd retaliated and told me she hated me. How at first, I was so happy that she was finally standing up to me, making it easier for me to not want to be by her, and then the overwhelming idea that she truly, in fact, hated me, and how I couldn't escape the feeling. How it would come and go--the wanting her, then the not wanting her--how I took so much pleasure in getting inside of her head while she was at one of her weakest moments, and how much I wished, so much, to do it again.
It was all so insecure, my feelings, the plan, Calantha. I couldn't wrap my head around how I felt about her, nor how I wanted to feel about her. Because I knew that I was supposed to fake my kindness toward her, and not truly fall for anything, yet how I did, indeed fall for something, and how I didn't want her to be near me because, for some reason, I had stopped wanting to be a part of her destruction in the end. But then it was there again, the longing and wanting to be near her, the feeling that I just needed to look at her so I'd feel whatever that emotion was inside of me, because there was nothing--no one else to make me feel that way.
