The King's Devotion

Chap 21 - Blue eyes

I told Charles, the gamma to inform him about my departure saying I had an important matter to attend to at my pack. With that, I was speeding through the amidst of tress on the road to my pack. Every tragedy of my life flashing through my eyes like a movie. I tightly held the steering wheel hoping this will somehow let me control my emotions that were going out of control. The drive seemed shorter than I had expected it to be. Probably because I spend it overthinking everything.

I parked the car in the garage and entered the pack house which was buzzing as it was evening now. The pack members seemed quite surprised with my arrival but nonetheless showed their respect to me as I passed by. I walked upto my room closing the door behind me and dropped on the bed. I laid there for hours looking out of the window trying to find answers but to no void. The cool breeze blowed in and hugged me like a blanket. The empty feeling in my heart did not go away.

It never does.

The door creaked open and Hayden's scent filled my nostrils. His footsteps echoing loud in the pin drop silent room.

"When did you come back?" He asked sitting down on the bed. He expectantly looked at me but I felt too tired to answer.

"Do you wanna eat something? How about some spicy ramen? Should I make some for you?" He threw questions at me hoping to get an answer. I shook my head but made no effort to move.

"Let me know if you need something." He got up and kissed my forehead. Pulling the covers over me, he left and the room fell silent yet again.

I wish my parents were here with me. I wish my mother was here to guide me through this. I wish that incident did not happen. I wish life wasn't like this. A single tear trickled down my right cheek which was pressed onto the pillow as I laid on my stomach. Hours passed by and soon enough I fell asleep as my eyelids felt heavy.

I gagged as the salty liquid flowed down my throat. My head bobbing up and down on his genitals as he groaned. Tears trickled down from the corner of my eyes as my gag reflexes kicked in but I couldn't do anything. He released my head and I moved back eager to get away from him. I felt disgusted with myself.

"Now, that was something. I must admit you are really good at it." He jested while zipping his pants. Tears clouded my vision as I stared down on the floor not being able to meet his gaze. There was nothing left for me. I had nothing. Absolutely nothing.

"I had a lovely mate you know. She was beautiful and perfect in every way. She was intelligent and everything a man could ask for. But she was cruel. She was so cruel that she dared to leave me alone without her." His voice breaking as he talked. I dared to look up and notice his blue eyes showing nothing but sorrow. The dark, stingy room with leaking pipes made it difficult to comprehend his expressions. But I was used to this darkness. It was a part me. An essential part of me.

"One day, she asked me about my whereabouts, about my work and wrong doings. She was getting suspicious of me. She started questioning me and my love for her saying I wasn't the man she fell in love with. How could she say that? We had a fucking son for God's sake. How could she say that? Then she slowly started defying me and filling my son's ears with lies about me. It continued for months but at the end it was all peace." A smile brightened up his rigged face. His blue eyes lighting up like stars on a moonless night. He looked at me smiling while I simply stared. I had grown used to these stories but I was intrigued by this one. Each was said to make me realize my worth and place. He never expressed his feelings or emotions.

Was his mate death the reason for his behavior?

"Come on, ask me how it was all peace suddenly." My heart pumped wildly inside my rib cage. Was he going to hurt me now?