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Friday March 13th 10:59 pm
"I can't avoid them forever"
I sigh out while putting the car in park. I looked up and took notice of my surroundings. A cemetery. Most people go to parks or rooftops hell, even the end of cliffs with a beautiful view to just sit down and breathe. Mine is this Cemetery, i have no idea why but i think being with people who are at rest also puts me in that state of mind. It's so quiet and peaceful and cemeteries can also be pretty. It's the best spot.
I remain in my car cause I know the cold air would be biting at my skin. My cigarette in it's tray fills the car with it's smoke. Music playing in the background.
Playing god by paramore
"I can't make my own decisions, Or make any with precision, Well, maybe you should tie me up, So I don't go where you don't want me"
I've been driving this whole time trying to avoid the boys. I know exactly what they wanna talk about but i don't wanna confront them just yet. I haven't said anything about Rin and I'm kinda scared too. I let out a little laugh.
"What the hell am i doing, avoiding my friends, to sneak around and see Rin, and damn have i been lucky paparazzi hasn't caught me this past month, actually now that i mention it, no one has mentioned me in inarizarki, the cops, the other families, hell even the inmates, all i see is whispers and stares, pointing and sometimes pictures but that's it"
"You say that I've been changing, That I'm not just simply aging, Yeah, how could that be logical?, Just keep on cramming ideas down my throat"
I mumble to myself with the feeling of gratitude filling my heart. I usually have these conversations in my head but it just feels better to actually say it out loud. I really need to start getting serious though, the italy show, fittings,look reviews, not to mention if other companies also wanna start working. What was I thinking, getting myself involved in love.... But I can't leave him, one ,my feelings won't let me and two, I made that promise and that's a promise I refuse to break. Well to be fair I refuse to break any promises.
