A Match Made in Mianite - A Tom Cassell Fan-Fiction

Y u do dis

Fuck. "How the hell am I going to get out of here?" I say, rubbing my eyes. I glance down at my phone, seeing that 2 hours have passed. "Well, i guess we'll find out tomorrow. Knowing our luck, we'll be here for days. Unless a miracle happens..." I shrug before smiling. "Well, until tomorrow. Bai!" I cut the stream before sighing. This gonna be rough. 

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*Next Day*

I start the stream before smiling. "Welp guys. I hope you have crosswords ready or something, cause this is going to be boring. I got mine." I hold up the crosswords before smiling. "Lets log in, then." I log into the server before seeing Wag in front of me. "And here he is! My favorite person." 

Waglington: I hope you slept well. 

Quixiotic: I guess. If you include my head being as flat as a board.

Waglington: I have to keep you away from the others. Your too dangerous.

Quixiotic: How? The most dangerous thing I have is iron.

Waglington: Not weapons...the one who cannot be named

Quixiotic: Voldemort?

Waglington: Your god, imbecile.

Quixiotic: Dianite? 

Waglington: Exactly. We can't have those lies being spread through the village, can we?  

Quixiotic: Are you saying I'm communist? 

Waglington: Dianite isn't real. Say it with me. Dianite isn't real. Say it with me.

Quixiotic: Waglington is a douche.

As soon as it goes through chat, he hits me with his sword again. 

Quixiotic: Douche

Waglington: I hope you enjoy it here.

He leaves the window before I pace back and forth. "And now the wait begins." 

*2 days later*

Waglington and I go through more interventions, each time ending with Wag hitting me. I've almost starved, but Wag would throw me a couple apples before that would happen. I already finished today's 'intervention' before I was sitting and working on today's crossword. I look up at the screen before seeing, Welcome Dianite to the Realm of Mianite! MY LORD! "Fuck you, fuck you. DIANITE IS REAL BITCHES!" 

Quixiotic: M'lord. I know that you just arrived, but I am in need of your assistance.

Dianite: What is it, follower?

Quixiotic: Waglington has trapped me in a bedrock cage for days now, and I cannot escape. I am need of your assistance to regain my freedom.

Dianite: Oh yes. That is why I'm here. I'll deal with that. 

I move a block over before seeing my entire cage gone, along with Dianite in front of me. 

Quixiotic: Thank you, m'lord. ]

Dianite: A gift.

He throws something at me before I smile. 

(Dianite>>Me) Run.

I run out of the area and back towards the priests house. FREEDOM!

(Me>>Dianite) Thank you, m'lord

(Dianite>>Me) Make it up to me later. Stay safe. I have plans for you and the one they call Syndicate. 

"Me and Tom? Interesting." I open my inventory, and see a sword. The Sword of Recklessness. +15 damage with sharpness and looting. "Just what we needed. Guys, we're gonna fuck shit up." 

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FREEEEEEEDOM! What plans do you think Dianite has for Quix and Tom? 

Where's Mianite and Ianite in this? 

DashingZiggy