Dream a little, Dream of me

They say home is where the heart is But that's not where mine lives

She climbed out, her stomach was growling and she was famished. She hadn't eaten in days. As she placed a foot down and got on her feet she slipped and hit her head on the floor.
"Ouch." She murmured placing a hand on her head and she hobbled over to the drawn curtains and opened them. Light poured in and she scowled at it. She felt annoyed at the brightness but she had to get something to eat or risk fainting. A bird was pecking at the window, she stuck out her middle finger at it.

Then she grabbed a ribbon and tied her hair up and in the meanwhile, glanced at her reflection in the vanity mirror and frowned deeper. Her eyes, that once shone with happiness were bloodshot and red rimmed. Her face was pale as ever, lost of colour and natural glow, but she didn't bother pinching them to redden. Her mouth was van and pulled into a deep scowl. She sighed.

She then quietly opened the door, and stepped out barefoot. The floorboard slightly creaked, and she made her way to the foyer, crossing hallways with an annoyed expression etched into her face. She then took a right and somehow reached the cold kitchens. She didn't find much. Nicholas was sitting on the counter in clean clothes and was eating an apple. She then searched for something, she looked in a few cabinets and old cupboards, finding some crockery and chinaware.

She found a wine goblet and a few bottle of champagne and wine. She grabbed a small cloth bag and put the bottles in it. She moved down to take a bag or berries and some fruit she didn't recognise.

"Stealing?"
"No." She snapped
"Sure." He said and she turned around shooting daggers.
And then she began walking to the room.
Not hers.
"Now you're going back to hibernation." He said
"It's none of your business."
"It is, if you're in my mothers room." He said
She turned around
"Your mother's?"
"Yes." He snapped
"Fine I'll find another." She said
"I don't care what you do, but wasting is no good."
"It's my life, I'll do what I want." She said
"Lilliana." He said
"What?" She yelled losing her patience
"What is your problem?" He asked
"Excuse me." She said harshly
"You've been screaming, I don't care how you waste away, I don't care about you. But no one wants to hear you screaming your throat dry every night and whenever you face your nightmares. If you're so keen on doing that, please go bury yourself somewhere because it won't gain you any pity or help. You want to go back. Be my guest, at least it'll be better than hearing you cry." He said

The words were a sharp knife that cut down the small self esteem she had, Shame flooded her, it engulfed her and tears threatened to spill.
And then a voice spoke in her head.
Don't cry in front of him.
You're strong enough to survive this fall.
You've always been strong enough to survive the fall.
Don't register the hurt.
Don't let him break you.
But I'm already broken.
Are you?
You are strong and you are powerful.
You don't have to be tamed to his liking.
Scream all you like.

"I'll scream all I want." She said
"No."
"I will." She said
"I'll make sure you won't." He said
And he took a step forward and she lifted him off his feet and chucked him at the wall.  She felt more tired after using the small tendrils of her magic. She then walked back to the room and barred the door with the drawer chest. And she threw the bag of the bottles on the bed and sat down. And she opened a wine bottle and began drinking it, all the while murmuring to herself.
Four hours later
Lilliana hiccuped and sniffed, her head was spinning.
She had drink two wine bottles and was drunk.
She cupped her hands after putting the bottle aside and small tendrils of ice floated and she giggled but also tears formed in her eyes blurring her vision.

She waved her hand and ice formed in the air. She threw her hand up and snow fell on her.
She closed her eyes enjoying the cold. 
She opened another wine bottle and took a swig.