Eighteen and Fabulous

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I have been rewatching all of Gossip Girl and I'm reminded instantly why I love the show so much. I have so many ideas for this rewrite and I hope you all stick around to read the differences.


"Though it seems like just yesterday Serena, Ella, and I were eight and playing dress-up in my mother's vintage Manolos, my 18th birthday has finally arrived." Blair gushes to her table full of her minions alongside Serena and me. "The party needs to be perfect, so blood orange martinis or beluga and belvedere? And of course, E everything will be a mocktail for you." Blair reassures me.

"Why don't we do different drinks tonight and do a taste test?" Penelope suggests as she kisses Blair's ass.

"Oh, I can't. I'm meeting my mother's new boyfriend." Blair declines.

"Even moms have boyfriends, and I don't." Hazel complains.

"Not E. She and Nate are on the outs." Penelope declares.

"Says who?" I question her.

"It's all over Gossip Girl of him and Little J kissing. It was only a matter of time..."

"My relationship with Nate is none of your damn business Penelope. But please, if you want to flirt with him, go right ahead. He'll just turn down your desperate ass like he's done since elementary school." I insult her, and she closes her mouth as the other minions are enjoying the moment.

"What did I say, Penelope?"

"I was just..."

"You have been demoted to standing the rest of party planning." Blair orders.

"But..." Dorota swiftly comes from behind and urges Penelope out of her chair.

"You will stand until I say otherwise." Blair orders, and Penelope lets out a giant puff of air. "Cyrus has been one of mom's attorneys since the divorce. He asked her out when they first met, but she didn't want to mix business with pleasure. Finally, his amorous overtures wore her down, and she agreed to dinner. She's been smitten ever since." Blair describes Eleanor's romance.

"Oh, that's so romantic." Nelly gushes.

"One thing that my mom has is good taste in men. Maybe a dashing stepdad is just what I need."

"Speaking of good taste in men, how's sexy artist, Serena?" Penelope is kissing Serena's ass now, and I just grab another sandwich.

"Oh, uh, Aaron's amazing. He's been sending me these maps to the most beautiful places. The other day I ended up in a private room in the cloisters overlooking the gardens." Serena explains.

"Spare them the details, Serena. Hazel will kill herself from envy." Blair mocks her minion.

"So Ella is...Carter..."

"You want to date my ex?" I question a very desperate Hazel.

"Yeah, and he's going to be E's baby daddy." Is reminds her.

"I know that. I was just... he's single and..."

"It's a no, Hazel! Ex-boyfriends are off-limits!" Blair orders.

"But E is dating Nate!" Penelope yells a little too loud.

"And I gave my blessing. They are meant for each other. While the likes of the four of you will be lucky if someone even looks at you." Blair insults them further.

"There's plenty of other guys to date." I remind them. Serena's phone goes off.

"Oh, this is him again. I gotta go." Serena interrupts.

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