Destined to Lose: The 5th book

Chapter 20: The New World

I use a handkerchief Daryl gave me to hold against the wound of Negan's neck. Siddiq starts to rip at his clothes to make something better, stronger, so we can transport him. All the while, I hear Maggie wailing behind me, "we have to make it right!"

I hear Rick telling her, "we can't make it right, but this makes it over. It's over." He commands.

Maggie squeals, "No! It's not over! It's not over until he's dead! It's not over till he's dead" her voice is cracking, and desperate. I take a second to look up to her as she pleads, "No! No! No. No. No."

Michonne is holding her back, both on the ground. Rick speaks to everyone now, "what happened, what we did... what we lost... there's gotta be something after. The ones who have 'em up, put your hands down. We're all gonna go home now." I try and keep Negan's head still. "Negan's alive. But his way of doing things is over."

Negan goes to chuckle and open his mouth to say something, so I quickly quip to him, "will you just shut-up for once. I know you like to hear your own voice but that doesn't mean the rest of us do."

Negan sort of smiles, through a heap full of blood pouring out of his mouth. I try and also listen to the rest of what Rick is saying. "This world is yours, by right. We are life. That's death! And it's coming for us. Unless we stand together! So go home. Then the work begins. The new world begins. All this... All this is just what was. There's gotta be somethin' after."

Another 15 minutes of Siddiq and I prepping Negan to move. Jerry manages to put together something resembling a gurney and the two men lift him up and onto it, walking him up the hill to get him to a truck. I hold the wrapped around covering that's on his neck as we move. When we get to the top of the hill, I call over to Jesus, "hold
this here.. I'll be right back."

Daryl has been eyeing me since I ran down their to help. I know I have to tell him why, but right now I just need him to know I'll see him back at Alexandria, "you wanna ride with me?"

"I'm gonna ride with Negan, keep his head sturdy during the ride." I reply.

He bites his lower lip, looks down and nods. More hair in front of his face when he looks back up to me. He asks, "why?"

"Because I can help with that." I reply.

"Why him?" He asks again, adding on.

I shrug, but tell him honestly, "because he's my friend."

Daryl just holds my stare for a few moments before nodding and turning around, "iight, I'll see ya later."

When we get back to Alexandria, Siddiq works quickly to stitch Negan's throat. We bandage his wounds, tie him up, and wait. Negan is out for the entire night and Siddiq and I take turns watching him. The next afternoon, Rick and Michonne both come in, and I stand at the edge of the room as they talk to him, "we know you're awake." Michonne snarls towards him.

Negan replies in a horse whisper, "I never said I wasn't."

Michonne replies, "good. Because we need to tell you some things. And you don't have to open your eyes now. But you're gonna open them soon. Because we're gonna make you watch what happens."

Rick adds, "and this isn't about who you killed. No, we've... We killed people. No, this is about what you did to us, what you did to so many people. How you made people live for you, how you put people under your boot."

Negan uses what strength he has to argue back, "I saved people!"

Michonne puts two fingers on his throat with force and he grunts in pain, "Michonne"
I say quickly.

"He needs to know." She says to me over her shoulder, "this isn't a discussion."

Rick says, "we can open up his stitches for a little while just to remind him. Carl pictured something better. All of us working together for something bigger than all of us. And you'll have a job, too." Michonne moves her fingers, Rick gets closer to her side.

She finishes what Rick was telling him, "yeah, you get to be a part of it. You'll be an example of what this will be."

Rick says, "we're not gonna kill you." Michonne shakes her head, "we're not gonna hurt you."

She shakes her head again, then adds, "you're gonna rot in a cell. For the rest of your life, day after day."

"You're gonna be evidence that we're makin' a civilization, something like what we had, something we're gonna get back." The two continue to speak.

Michonne tells him, "and you get to watch it happen."

Rick says, "and you get to see how wrong you were about what people can be, about what life can be. You, alive, is gonna help show people that things have changed, that keepin' you breathing earns another way, a better way."

Michonne starts to back up, "that's the part you'll play. So after all this... maybe you're good for something." She leaves the room, followed by Rick and I watch as Negan just stares at the ceiling above, eyes open and squinted with anger.

I let him lay there for a bit, before moving to his side to tell him. I sigh, before starting but say, "part of me is relieved it's over. This isn't exactly the outcome you were ever expecting, huh?" Negan holds my glare, knowing I know this answer and telling me it was stupid to ask. I say back, "you're lucky Rick didn't kill you. You're lucky it was him and not anyone else."

I stand up, going to leave and switch with Siddiq, Negan scratchily says, "what about you? Would you have killed me over by that tree."

I stop walking, to think about what to say. I turn back around and tell him honestly, "no, I wouldn't have. I never wanted anyone to die, even you."

"We'll aren't you a doll." He tries to get it to sound sarcastic but it comes off cold. He smiles and says, "but I guess I should thank you for saving my life."

I shake my head, "no, Rick did that. Make sure you thank him." I get to the door but before I open it to leave, I tell him, "I'm going back to the hilltop to be with Daryl. Try not to be an ass to everyone you talk too, Negan."

"Tell darry boy I said Hello." He whispers out as I leave.