Fall For Me

19

EDITED

19

Jackson's POV

I have been studying my ass off while managing taking care of Jaycee. There was so much going on that no one really knew what to do with themselves. Myself included.

I have this stupid finals exam that I needed to do good on. My future is over if I get kicked out of Stanford; I'll be done forth. I was going somewhere, learning stuff with Jace as my tutor, but I can't ask that much of her right now. I had to take care of Jaycee because I knew how hard it was when I lost Lance and my parents. It destroyed me, it took me forever to not feel emotionally dead, that was even with the help of Matt and Caleb. Jaycee is alone now, though. Clarissa was her only friend here, aside from Matt, Caleb, and I. I want to be there for her as much as I can. Lastly, as self-centered as this sounds, I was practically drowning in my own misery. All of this Clarissa talk has me thinking about my family nonstop. All of those damn people I have lost...

I handed Jaycee a bowl of soup and sat back down next to her on my bed, picking up my math study materials. There was no way I was going to pass this test; I may be doing well enough, but I know I'm not ready for a college sophomore math class exam. How the hell have I made it this far, anyway?

"Jack, I'm going home tomorrow for a break from everything." Jaycee whispered from beside me. I don't remember the last time she had talked in a normal tone; she's always whispering.

"I think it'll be good for you." I replied softly, kissing her temple. "I think I will go home to see my Mom and sister, too."

Jaycee struggled to give me a soft smile, but she pulled through and that made me smile.

"Baby, I know how hard this is for you, but it will be okay and we will always have a piece of Claire." Claire and Josh's child.

"I know," came her soft murmur and the crack of her voice. "I know."

"I know you feel like you owe it to Claire to think about her all of the time and mourn over her death nonstop, but the truth is, I'm sure she wants you to go on with your life and be happy." I said as I drapped my arm over her shoulders, giving her a squeeze.

Jaycee has not replied to her nickname Jace since the incident, insisting to not be called that anymore due to the fact Claire had started it.

I abandoned my dorm room for a little while, seeing as Jaycee wanted to nap and I needed to talk to Matt. I just need to be able to sit down and have a conversation with my best friend, right now.

The door was wide open so I allowed myself in and plopped down next to Matt and Caleb on the couch as they played Call of Duty. They knew I was here, obviously, but they continued to play their game like they would any other time I would show up unannounced.

"How're you, bro?" Matt asked, with a risen eyebrow.

"I'm calling my mom tomorrow, telling her I'm going home for a few days. I can't stand being here much longer."

"And Jaycee?" Caleb asked.

"She is going home tomorrow, too, flying." I answered, then I turned to Matt. "Want to try and help me study for this damned math test?" Matt chuckled, but agreed to.

"Jack, when was the last time you actually slept a solid, at least, 4 hours?" Caleb asked, examining the bags beneath my eyes. When I shrugged, he rolled his eyes. "I'll be right back, I'm taking Jaycee out for a bit, while you get some shut eye." I attempted argue, but fighting with Caleb was completely pointless.

He has a girlfriend and a child: he's a professional arguer at this point.

I had finally gotten a solid hour of sleep and nothing has felt so good in such a long time.

I turned the TV on and the channel was previously set on the news. What still seemed to be the main subject of every news channel in California? None other than, Clarissa Evans.

I missed Lance and I missed my father and mother. It is crazy how easy it is for your most loved ones to be just yanked from your fingers. It's not even prying because at least with prying you have a chance to save them. They were all just taken away from me.

I thought back to what I used to do when Lance had died, how I would cope with my feelings. I wasn't that type of person anymore, I have Jaycee and I know now how I truly felt about her; I love Jaycee Gardner. I didn't want to ever be the reason for any pain she felt, unless it were to be her giving birth to our child. That is the only pain of hers I wish to be responsible of. I cared about her more than anyone would ever guess. I was not about to hurt her and lose her, merely because I know no other way to deal with my feelings.

•••

WOW.

Just WOW.

Yes, WOW is all I have to say.

IM ALIVE AND I UPDATED! 8 months is a long ass time! Im so sorry, my writers block has obviously been horrible. Now, I don't know WHEN the next update will be, but i assure you it will NOT take 8 months again.

I know it's short, but it was hard enough to write. Now I have some questions about the story. I have lost a lot of memory about this story in the past 8 months, I have a few questions if anyone wanted to answer them! If you are pretty certain I didn't say any of these things yet, answer with TBA.

1. What is Jack's sister's name and Mom's name?

2. What is Caleb's kid and girlfriend's names?

3. Where are Jack and Jaycee from?

Think that is it for now. Forewarning, if no one answers those ^^ it's fine, but the update will take longer because I will have to reread all of the book that I have written so far and that could take a while.

Thank you for sticking around!

- emily