Second Chance to Love

Chapter 50

Sorry I havent been on in the past couple of days. I am in a fibromyalgia flare up and my depression and anxiety hasnt really helped in me recovering. It also hasnt helped that I have been receiving multiple messages saying that my stories are not good but okay or blah. I dont really understand why these people would take the effort to message me and tell me that my stories are bad when they could have just quit reading them if they didnt like them. It really affected my motivation but I keep trying to tell myself that there are readers that love reading the stories and keep trying to push forward. I will never understand internet trolls but I have to admit these messages have sunk it and make me question if I should even try to keep going on the stories. Im sorry that my stories arent best sellers but I never tried strived to be up to those standards in the first place. I know Im not a best selling author but I thought maybe a few people would like the stories I have in my head. I just wanted to make some people smile at the end of the day with some fantasy stories, thats all. People dont have to be cruel and point out someones flaws, just be respectful and nice, thats all I ask. Im sorry I have failed my followers that do cherish the stories and will try and get out of the flare up, ignore the hate, and regain some motivation soon. Until then here are some of what I had written before the flare up and hate messages.

She spent another few months in the hospital seeming to do well. She managed to get up and walk around without getting dizzy as much, but she still got dizzy at times and it wore her out. She was getting upset about her progress and the guys had to keep reminding her that she was doing better than anyone expected. Amorae was attached to her like glue but everyone expected that and Rose didnt mind one bit. There was talk that she could go home in the morning if she kept improving. She was even having less panic attacks when the guys would leave the room to do something, Kota said it was the fact that her mind was slowly starting to accept that the trauma was over with and getting her body to trust that she was safe and okay. She still had nightmares and flash backs but thankfully the men held her and helped her through everything. She just hoped they werent getting annoyed or tired of having to take care of her and Amore so much. She really feared that they would become too much for the men and want to leave her and Amore.

Rose woke up and pouted, her whole body felt like it was encased in concrete. She whimpered and tried to shift to see if that would help her pain just a little bit. Instead it sent lava through her veins. She let out another whimper and felt a tear slip free which burned her skin.

"Whats wrong Baby?" North asked instantly waking up when he felt her move. She felt another tear slip free and she pouted. "Are you hurting?" she let out a whimper and he nodded. "Ok, Baby, Ill wake Doc so he can get you feeling better." He shifted since she was resting on his arm and that caused the lava to burn even more in her. She whimpered and started crying. "Im sorry Baby," North whispered and stopped moving. "Lucian wake up now," he growled as he shook Luke.

"What?" Luke asked groggily.

"Wake Doc, shes hurting a lot, I cant move because it hurts her," North said and Luke nodded. He got out of the bed and placed a pillow by Amore so she thought she was still by Daddy Luke.

"Hey Doc," Luke said gently shaking Sean which caused Owen to wake also. "Doc wake up."

"Yeah?" Sean asked groggily.

"Cupcake is in a lot of pain," Luke said yawning and rubbing his eyes.

Sean instantly woke up and rushed over. "Whats wrong Pookie?" Tears slipped free causing her to whimper even more. "North, move so I can check her."

"I cant and wont Doc, I tried earlier and she started crying, it hurts her for me to move and for her to move, thats what woke me up," North shook his head.

"Oh okay, shes in a major flare up then," Sean nodded. "Does your body feel like its heavy or burning or can you try and tell me Pookie?"

"Both," she managed to whisper. "Hurt so bad. Sorry wake you everyone," she but her lip to try and stop the crying and whimpering.

"Dont be Darling," Owen said pushing some hair off her face. "We want to take care you, remember?"

"But its too much and youve missed too many assignments and life on hold," She closed her eyes and bit her lip again.

"Stop Baby," North whispered as he pulled her lip free, "Dont hurt your lip."

"We havent missed anything Darling," Owen started to rub her hand but stopped when she flinched.

"Our life isnt on hold Doll," Axel said softly. "Our life was just missions before, you and Baby Bird has given us so much happiness and love again. We wouldnt be anywhere else right now."

"If you hadnt met me you would be doing missions right now saving the world and not stuck in a hospital for god knows how long," she whispered. "Youre going to resent me for this."

"Net Kitten," Raven growled. "Never."

"Im just a mess," she whispered.

"Open your eyes," Owen commanded. She barely opened them, and tears painted her face. "You are the most precious person to us other than our daughter. Never forget that, we wouldnt want to be anywhere you arent. You have made our lives so much better, we swear it."

"Pookie, are you just having a bad day because you have been making so much progress and now you are set back due to the flare up?" Sean asked. She closed her eyes then bit her lip as Amore started to move and wake up.

Corey came over and picked her up. "Momma," Amore shook her head at Corey.

"Mommy needs a moment right now Baby Bird, lets have Daddy Gabriel get you dressed and ready for the day, okay?" Corey asked and she shook her head.

"Go brush your teeth and hair Love, then we will play," Rose said fighting through the pain to sit up.

"Dont Baby," North said softly. She pushed him away and forced herself to sit up. "Stop Baby."

"Im fine," She said through clenched teeth. "She needs me."

"She needs you to get better first," Sean said in doctor mode.

"I know that," she said in anger. "Im trying alright?"

"We know Darling," Owen nodded. "Dr. Green, do you think a change of environment will be beneficial?"

"I cant since Im not better so just stop," Rose glared at him.

"Ill go speak to the hospital administration," Sean nodded and left the room.

"Just stop," she said through clenched teeth. Owen ran his fingers through her hair as he sat beside her.

"No," Owen shook his head. "We all know you are just frustrated and in pain right now, its perfectly understandable that you are lashing out. We dont take it personally one bit Darling. We would rather you lash out at us instead of keeping it bottled up."

"Im sorry," She whispered as she started crying harder.

"Oh Darling," Owen said pulling her into his lap slowly and carefully. "Just let it out." He glanced over at everyone as she cried herself to sleep. They agreed she needed to get out of there soon before her depression got worse.