Ardently |h.s|

thirty six

I had been hoping to see Harry yesterday after our night together, but he never came to visit. I hope that he does not avoid me now that I asked for more from him.

Harry loves me. Every time I think about those words falling off his lips, it brings the biggest smile to my face. He loves me. He truly does love me. I can picture us now, getting married and raising a family together and truly being in love.

Not everyone is so lucky to find the man they love. It is even more difficult to find a man who will love you back. Yet, I have found both. Harry and I are destined for each other, I know that now.

The Viscountess has taken note of my cheerful mood as of yesterday, asking me time and time again what has caused my sudden spike in happiness. I've been avoiding her questions, attempting to just blame my mood on my reconciling with Liam and his engagement to Penelope. She seems to believe me, which is good.

Soon there will be two weddings, Liam's and mine.

I know he will propose any day now. He's told me he loves me, we talked briefly about our wedding. The next time he comes to visit me I have no doubt in my mind he will ask me. And I will say yes, joyfully.

As I fuss over the dress I am wearing, a slight hum escapes me. I smile, humming a tune, making sure my dress looks perfect. I do not want to look dreadful the day that he proposes. I want that day to be absolutely perfect.

It is strange to think of how much I used to loathe the man. How he could barely stand in the same room as me. When he sits in our drawing room, excitedly keeping up a conversation, I think back to the first time he visited to invite me to his birthday. He has changed tremendously since then.

Perhaps that is why I have fallen so hard for him. Because he has put every effort possible into becoming a better person for himself and for me. He is no longer rude to staff. He does not engage in fights or purposely piss people off. He does not frequent the gentleman's clubs to find prostitutes to keep his bed warm. He is completely devoted to me.

The old Harry would have said whatever he needed to so he could get me into a compromising position. He would not care about my virtue. But he stopped us from going too far last night, and I am thankful for that.

We spent the rest of the night telling each other how much we love each other, and figuring out ways to deal with the Duke of Manchester's unrelenting quest to steal me away. He calmed down a lot about that and even apologized to me for accusing me of such scandalous behavior.

As frustrating as it was to have to deal with him that night, the jealousy flattered me. He wants to be the only one to provide me with love and affection, and he will stop anyone threatening to get in our way. He truly cares about our relationship and wants it to work. That is how I know how much of a changed man he is.

Looking once more in the mirror, I smoothen out my dress. With a content sigh, I turn around, making my way down the stairs to sit in the drawing room and wait for Harry to come visit. He must visit today, I am sure of it.

Since I'm in a happy mood, and when I am in such a sunny disposition I tend to become more musically inclined, I sit down at the pianoforte. The Viscountess has been helping me become more proficient since I was never formally trained. She was quite impressed with my skill so far though.

As I play, the Viscountess sits on the couch, reading whatever gossip paper she has received in town this morning. She always rattles on to me about who has done what, however I never pay attention. Who cares about stupid gossip anyway?

The only time I actually listen is when she mentions Harry and I have been talked about. I always get a little nervous that someone would have seen us kissing or just being alone together. Usually it is only good things, which I'm relieved about. I do not want to deal with the chaos that would be an article about my ruin.