Chapter 16

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I have lust for him. I have want and need. And right now, in this moment, where there is no one else in the world, where it's just me and him, this is where that feeling is the strongest.

I bring him closer to me, raking my hand through his hair. His lips stiffen within the first few seconds, making me want him more. A small gasp leaves my mouth as Ferris' hand trails down my body. Taking advantage, he pushes his tongue through my lips, massaging the inside of my mouth. I can't do this. This is wrong.

I pull away from the kiss, turning to face the wall instead of the heart-capturing boy behind me. A deep sigh leaves my mouth, followed by a couple of gibberish words. The feeling of Ferris' lips against mine made me feel so much joy, even thinking about it gives me butterflies in my stomach. I bet this is how Christina felt when she was the one that was lip-locking with him.

"What's wrong?" Says the voice behind me, jolting me out of my thoughts.

I quickly turn around to see dark brown eyes piercing through me.

"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have done that." I quickly explain.

"It's fine," He states, a small smile playing on his face.

"Oh..." Is all I can say. I wish that I could tell him that I liked the kiss, but I know I can't. I can't betray Christina's trust. I have to back away. "I have to go back to class." I say, wishing that I could be around a little longer.

"Sure." He moves back just enough for me to slip away from him. Quickly, I stepped out from next to him, making my way back to my biology lesson that's probably almost finished.

The gears in my mind won't stop turning, thinking about what just happened. Holy cow. That was my first kiss. And it was amazing. My inexperience did downgrade the amazingness of it but I wouldn't change it one bit.

As I reach the door to my classroom, my mind wanders to what Christina would think of this... harsh betrayal. Suddenly, I regret kissing Ferris. I can't do this to Christina, she's my friend and I just coldly betrayed her by kissing the guy who broke her heart. And the stupid thing is, he will probably end up hurting me aswell. And I fell for his trap, his stupid good looks drew me in, and now, it'll be my heart that will be broken. And I just let myself kiss him. I decided that losing my friend is better than getting my heart shattered and now I have to live with the consequences.

Before I can open the door, a stream of people rush out of the room. Quickly, I enter the room, grab my stuff and run out. I don't think I can face Christina right now, not after what I did. I guess I'll have to find Tyler, knowing that he has something to tell me sends butterflies into my stomach. With every step I take, my nervousness escalates, punching through my barrier and taking over my body.

When I reach the canteen, I see Tyler sitting on a two- seater table, eating another wrap. Slowly, I approach him, wondering what to say. Tyler looks up as I grow closer to the table, his face lighting up and then dropping just as quickly.

"Hey..." I hesitantly started the conversation, hoping that he would reply.

"Hi..." He answers as I sit down opposite him, searching his eyes for signs of emotion.

"You said you wanted to talk."

Tyler quickly looks up into my eyes, fear spread all across his face.

"Yeah... Yeah I did." He answers after a while. "I wanted to tell you... You know what? It doesn't matter." And with that, he picks up his bag and walks away, leaving his wrap on the table. Confusion takes over my mind until my body stiffens at the sight of Christina walking into the canteen with Sophia by her side. I catch my breath, unsure on what to do when Christina spots me and gestures to Sopia to come. Oh no.

"Hey!" Christina shouts over the rowdy collage students as she sits down opposite me.

Sophia pulls up a chair and sits down, pulling up her dress as she did so.

"Hey..." I answer, unsure of what to do.

"So," Christina starts, a huge smile spread across her face. "Since your birthday is coming up, I'm going to throw a birthday party for you at my house and I'm not taking no for an answer." Crap. I forgot about my birthday. 7th of June 2003 was the day my mum birthed me in the living room with 2 midwives surrounding her. And the third of June is coming up VERY soon and Christina is planning a birthday party. This isn't going to go well.

"Really?" Sophia says after I didn't reply.

"Yeah. And you are both coming, no matter what." I look at Christina. Her eyes are hopeful as she eyes me, I can see the glimmer of desire hiding behind her light blue pupils.

"Fine." I sigh; I understand where she's coming from, I'm her new friend, she hardly hangs out with the popular girls anymore. Me and Sophia know her better than her fake friends ever could. And I'm grateful for that. Well... I would be if I hadn't already gone behind her back and betrayed her so coldly.

"What's wrong?" I hear Christina say, her warm hand stroking mine. I didn't notice the tears that have appeared in the corner of my eyes or the concern filling both of my friend's eyes.

I rapidly stand, ripping my hand away from Christina's tender touch.

"Nothing... I..." I quickly wipe my tears and run out of the building, ignoring the painful footsteps behind me.

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