Growing up with the sea in hot February, the Australian Ocean had been the love of Cyril's life. His surfing career was at its peak at twenty, winning him the trophy of his life in March, but March also got him a huge heartache. He got ghosted by hi...
Cyril paddled his bicycle on the footpath, looking at the ocean beside him. The glimmering water, little surfboards on the waves brought a smile to his face. "I met my ex today," He said aloud. Heart paddled beside him, "Really?" He looked into her eyes, "Yeah..." "How did it go?" They parked their bicycles outside the ballet academy.
"It was... Nostalgic,"
She laughed, "I guess people can be nostalgic too," "They can. He reminds me of places I've never been to," Cyril closed his locker, "And that really messes me up," "Why?" Heart asked as they stretched themselves before the dance routine. "Because he was good to me and I wasn't,"
"It's okay. Let's just stop talking about him, it was your past," She got up, "You want to dance?" "Sure," He smiled. They followed the music, but it didn't make Cyril happy anymore. His train of thought seemed to fall endlessly, seeping into the deep. Waves had never hit as hard as the fact that he had him and he lost him.
"He had sex with me," Cyril stopped dancing, he wanted to say it. He wanted to tell someone he couldn't forget that feeling, even if he hated it. Heart stopped immediately and looked at him, "...Did you want that?" "I did," Cyril looked down, "I don't understand myself. I love girls but I just... I can't love them the way most guys do. It should be okay, right? Like, the world has bigger problems than boys who kiss boys and girls who kiss girls,"
"Hold on, are you lesbian?" Heart asked. "No, I'm..." FUCK! "I'm a lesbian enthusiast," "Oh..." She seemed disappointed, "I see," It seemed Edgar's words had saved Cyril once again.
"Well, are you a lesbian enthusiast?" Cyril laughed nervously. Heart smiled, "No, But I'm a lesbian,"
. . .
"OH MY FUCKING GOD NIGGA!" Edgar yelled at the top of his lungs. Cyril sat before his computer, on a video call with Skyler and Edgar. All of them were playing a video game and Edgar was losing at always, "A LESBIAN WOOHOO! AYO, WHEN YOU FUCK, SEND ME A VIDEO!" He was so loud that his mom woke up, walked upstairs and opened the door to his room, "Why you yelling at fucking two in the morning, you goddamn filth!" "It's a guy thing, mom!" "Shut your bitch ass up and fucking go to bed or else imma beat your immigrant ass up!" "Mom...You're black too,"
"COME HERE, YOU LIL' NIGGA!" And she started beating him to death on camera while he was laughing his ass off. Cyril just stared at him and Skyler was asleep in his chair. Once she was done, she left the room. "Damn, felt like I fell into nettle leaves," He fixed his T-shirt and put on his headset again, "Anyways,"
"I think I'm doing something horrible," Cyril said. "What do you mean?" Edgar asked. "I'm constantly lying to her. Like, should I tell her I'm a guy?" "You're gonna make it worse for yourself," Skyler woke up, "If you tell her now that you were a guy all along, it's gonna break her trust in you," "Yeah but it's better if I tell her who I am, instead of some Tom, Dick or Harry telling her who I truly am. I can't keep this up forever. I have to let her know. It feels like I'm just treading water,"
"What's into you suddenly?" Edgar asked. "Yeah, you acting like you have a brain," Skyker said.
"I saw Glizzly in my sleep last night," Cyril played with his controller, "And for a moment, I thought he was real. He looked so beautiful, just like he always does. And...And I hate my mind playing these tricks on me but I...I guess that I'd just have to love him from a distance..." "You're in love with him?" Skyler asked. "With two people at once?"
Cyril rubbed his eyes, "Ugh! I don't know,"
"That's fucked up," "That's hot,"
"I mean," Cyril looked at the dark beach from his window, "I like Heart but...I don't know if I'm crazy for her," "Look dude," Edgar looked at him, "Unless it's mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it's a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life, love shouldn't be one of them,"
"Well, mad, passionate love lasts as long as the butterflies do," Cyril said, "Flittering fast, so they're long gone. True love, is finding the mad, passionate life in the mediocre things. The butterflies might die, but you know there's always going to be new cocoons," Cyril looked at a flower kept inside a vase on his table, he slowly pulled it out.
It's such a lover that even when all we have left are memories like cherished moments with loved ones, like falling stars on quiet nights long gone by, like long roads that seem to carry us, like the white noise of the ocean's lullaby or the many sunsets that kissed our days into the night. Like flowers blooming beside an old abandoned house, we hold on to memories as a child to their favourite toy...for the purpose...for comfort...that we may believe in our being... knowing that we are a part of something...connected to the world of all that is...memories...when they are all that we have left...no more flowers from the soils of what too soon becomes a short life. We cling to these memories that life should not more quickly disappear...the colours...the smells...the sounds we've named and called music...the warmth from a tender touch...all of our memories...even when all that we have left...they are the insights...the gifts of a life in constant rebirth...the hope born from faith...to believe in all of our being...that life exists...
Yet, in spring hope grew, its roots were deep and strong. Moving and taking place where there once was an empty dark cave.Now, if the flowers stay, hope and beautiful things grow, and it would no longer be a dark empty shell. For a shade once cover me to make me hope, now if it whithers I am left, in the empty shell of brokenness.
"I have something to tell you," Cyril looked into his phone. "Mate, I can see it ending badly," Edgar spoke in the background. "Sure :3 In front of the academy building?"
He held that dandelion he had plucked out from the roadside between his fingers and ran his way uphill to the academy building when suddenly his hair started growing longer and his body morphology changed once again, "WHAT THE FUCK?!" He looked at himself by the time he reached the academy. "So," Heart stood before him, What did you wanted to tell me?"
"I-" FUCK ME! Now, his confidence wavered, but determined as he was, he decided to use the situation to his advantage, "It seems I fancy you," She giggled, "What?! Is that why you've brought me a flower?" She had a smile on her face, but frankly, she was very excited. And very horny.
He smiled, "A beautiful lovely woman should always be given flowers. Not just on a special occasion, but whenever the mood strikes him," "Fancy lines you got there, did you practice in the mirror," "I need no mirrors to speak to you in poetry," Now, he didn't know what he was doing, he just went with the flow, "I have a confession to make though,"
"Yeah?" "I identify as a man,"
. . .
Skyler plucked away his chopsticks and one of them broke, "Hmm," "You want a fork?" Edgar blew air on the noodles while they were still on the stove, being cooked. They stood inside Skyler's kitchen. "I have a feel Cyril's gonna get fucked by some random ass person again," Skyler said. "In a good way or bad?" Edgar asked. "I don't know. I ain't some astrologer,"
-To be continued
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