Electric Love 𓇽 JJ Maybank

2.08.2

JJ drove my car down the road in the direction to where my dad was burried. Step dad I guess, not Ward. Despite everything, my mom wanted to be burried next to him. I mean if my other option was Ward, a murder, I would have probably picked my dad aswell. Although I wouldn't put murder pass my dad either.

"Do you wanna... talk about her?" JJ asked causing me to scoff.

"Do I want to talk about my mom? No actually I don't. I'm about to go bury her so no I do not want to think of the good times with her and then cry. I just want to get this over with." I mumbled leaning back in the chair.

It was silent for a minute, just JJs ring hitting the steering wheel as he tapped his finger against it.

"I don't remember a whole lot of my mom." JJ started causing me to look over at him slightly. "You know, she was pretty. Blonde, blue eyes.  I get that from the photo I keep in my wallet of her." JJ said messing with his wallet in his pocket. He handed it to me and I opened it looking at the contents of the wallet. $23.17, a gum wrapper, 3 receipts, a juul pod, a condom, and two picture where the drivers license would normally go. One of  them was a photo of a blonde, blue eyed women. It was ripped in half and I could see it was JJs mom and dad on their wedding day, he or someone had ripped off his dad. The other photo was of me at John bs last year before any of this shit had ever happen, I was laughing as I laid in JJs lap.

"You know so when she left," JJ said, I grabbed the photo of his mom and held it up to myslef, "you know I didn't really remember it. I was young and my dad didn't say shit about it." He huffed lightly.

"My dad was going out of town for somthing that week, maybe to try to get her back or maybe trying to leave me, so I went over to your house for the week. Your mom made us cookies and made up the guest room for me and she asked me how my mom was doing." JJ looked out the window quickly as he turned, "I told her, you know mom left, and your mom looked at me and said, 'don't worry, until she comes back, I'll be your mom.'" JJ put the car in park and unbuckled his seatbelt, "and she never came back."

I stayed quiet for minute, gnawing on the inside of my lip trying not to cry at his words but also at the thought of my mom.
"Okay." I breathed out, unbuckling my seatbelt as well. "Come on."

"Are you sure? If you want to be alone I get it." JJ said.

"She'd want you there. I want you there." I said wiping my face, "now come on. Please."

~~~~

Me and JJ stared down at the filled up hole, an unmarked grave marker that I couldn't afford to get engraved, marked her spot next to my father.
It looked sad. As if this person was forgotten by their family, like they weren't important. But she was, she was important.

"Can I.. can I borrow your knife real quick?" I asked looking up at JJ.

He rummaged threw his pocket and pulled out his pocket knife, handing it to me.
I grabbed it, flicking it out and kneeling down to the gray stone, scratching her name into it. It wasn't enough to probably keep her name there forever but I think it would be a nice tradition to come her and trace her name every now and then.

I stood up and admired my work handing JJ back his knife. We stood in silence as we looked down at the stone. So little done for a women who lived an extraordinary life.
It was silent for a good 5 minutes before the silence actually hit me.
No more hearing my mothers southern twang in the back of her words. No more smelling her Victoria secrets 'very sexy' perfume.
No more of her buying me flowers on my birthday.
No more of her asking me how my day at school was.
No more of her and me gossiping over the people I had crushes.
No more of her taking me to toilet paper their houses when they dump me.
No more of her buying John bs grocery's.
No more helping Pope with his homework.
No more doing Sarah's makeup for the dances.
No more taking Kie dress shopping.
No more being JJs mom.
No more being my mom.
A tear drop hit the grave stone and as soon as it did, JJ wrapped his arms around my shoulders pulling me into him.