Scar

Not over

Elmer's POV

Night has turned into morning. I stare out the glass doors looking at the same trees I was looking at when night painted them dark. My back is still turned to the front door out of which he left. My feet hurt but not as bad anymore. My body shivers again but I am not so cold that I have to get up and wrap myself in one of the furs.

I feel free and more alone than I ever have before. This house is one big reminder of the life I should have lived. The life I couldn't have with him and can't have without him. I have to do this on my own now and I have no idea how.

The sun dares to touch me. His rays grace the side of my face as they fall in and reach across the floor for me. I twitch from the subtle heat. My body groans as I force it to move. All my joints hurt as the break free from their statue state.

I thought I wouldn't be alive by now. None of the thoughts in my head thought it would go down like this. Even in the most ridiculous of my dreams I wouldn't have thought that I would be strong enough to tell him to leave.

Just as I stand up I hear someone at the door. Two pair of steps and then a soft knock. Simon and Nala smile at me awkwardly.

"Hi, Elmer! I know it's rude to visit a couple the morning after their ceremony but I just wanted to check in" Simon excuses himself and looks me up and down as if searching for injuries.

"He didn't kill me if that is what you want to know. Not that you ever cared about my safety" I hiss, suddenly so mad I cannnot control myself.

"Elmer, I-"

"I can't believe you never told me what he did to Matthew! Did you even once think about what he would do to me?! I bet you knew, and saw, and still did nothing" I trail off, suddenly just sad that my alpha had let me be hurt.

"Did he tell you?"

"He told me that tried to kill you as a cub and only failed because his own mother stopped him to which he answered by mauling her hindlegs. He propably would have killed her to, right? If Matthew hadn't pushed him of the cliff. I still can't believe that he killed his own brother" I mumble, half to myself now.

"I know that I have failed you as an alpha and that I can't make up for what we put you through. I just had so much hope that we could fix him. That it wasn't a problem. That he could stop" Simon confesses and takes my hand about to apologize in a deeper way when Nala interrupts him.

"Where is Scar?"

"He took off. I told him to go. And he left. I don't think he is comming back" I inform them and turn around. With the door open I can feel how cold it is. Wrapping myself in my fur I turn to them.

Simon looks like something really bad has happened and Nala looks more worried than I thought she could. Why are they not acting like this is a good thing?

"Him leaving us is the best thing that could have happened. We are now free of his darkness. No one has to be afraid anymore!" I bark at them.

"No, Elmer. If he loses control it won't be just a slip-up like when he killed Matthew. That was Cassian still fighting to control it. If he lets go and gets consumed by the darkness it will use all his fear and all his bad emotions to take revenge. He will come back but not as himself, but as the reaper" Simon tells me as if he is repeating something he's been told his whole life.

"That cannot be true. He isn't some kind of fairy tale monster" I scoff at him.

"We are not humans, Elmer. Cassian is not some young man with a bad behavior; he is a wolf, a dark wolf. His darkness doesn't come from society, it comes from within. The only way to make sure it never comes out is to kill it" Simon swears and his eyes do not lie to me.

"But if he stays away..."

"Then he will become sad and lonely and the dark will take a hold of him and never let go. I have to find him, before he is lost forever. Where did he go?"

My eyes stare into Simon's but I don't see him. I stand there, hearing him, looking at him but it is as if I cannot move. Will I never be free from this curse? Even like this, deciding to part ways I am still not free from him. Will he come back like a malicious ghoul and kill me anyway?

"I have no idea. I told him to go and he went. He didn't say anything. I didn't ask where he was going. So I don't know" I mutter.

"I know that you don't have the strongest bond but he is your mate. You can find him" Simon reminds me.

"We are not mates anymore. I told him to leave me" I tell him defiantly.

"We are not like humans. A mateship cannot be broken so easily. Even if you hate each other your bond will still bind you together."

"But he hurt me. And I hate him. And why would I want to save him if he cannot change. Let him go on a killing spree and be killed himself" I mutter.

"I am not asking you to save him. We cannot save him. But we have to find him if are to save ourselves. I will kill him myself if it comes to that; I promise" Simon pleads.

"No! You can't! You won't survive that" Nala warns him.

"I have made a lot of mistakes as alpha. I can't let my pack down anymore. I have to take responsebility. It was my fault that he killed my father and it was me who pleaded for him to stay here with us. I have to fix this" he promises.

"Fine. I will help you find him. But after that you are on your own" I agree.