Scar

A terrible hand

Scar's POV

Elmer is a heaped up mess on the divan. He is panthing, red in the face and with a scent so alluring I can't help but grumble. The fire in my hips grow and I can only imagine what is happening in Elmer's body. 

"Elmer...?" I start carefully and his eyes change as if he has been yanked back to reality. He clutches my black fur in in his hands, sitting on his hind legs. All I want to do is tare his clothes off but something is holding me back. 

My mate is shivering and releasing more and more of his scent. His breathing is shallow, and the way he clutches the fur while writhing his hips makes me think that he doesn't want to do this. Every one of my senses are telling me he wants it. My wolfy side is certain that he wants me to breed him, but in my heart I can still feel that he propably doesn't. 

"You're in heat" I tell him, just to lay our card out on the table. He shakes his head. 

"No. No that isn't possible" he disagrees as if he can make this something it is not. I look at my mate, at the person I love more than anything in this world, at the one I have hurt since he was little. Right now he is in pain because the heat is supposed to force mates to mate, and he can't act on that beacuse he doesn't want to mate with me. He is only going to be in more pain as this progresses. This is truly a terrible hand of cards that he has been dealt. 

"I know that you don't want to... but we have to do something. It's going to become very painful soon and I keep my calm forever" I tell him and draw a deep breath too contain myself as another wave of his pheromones hit me. 

"I feel strange" Elmer mumbles and as a large shiver makes his body tremble. Little tears form in the corner of his eyes. 

"And you are going to feel worse. You have to jerk off again, just like you did in the bathroom at the alpha's house" I urge him, still standing a few feet away. I don't think I would be able to control myself if I was next to him, close enough to touch. 

"I didn't do anything in the bathroom" Elmer confesses and shakes his head. The brown curls flail about and I can't help thinking about the little flower that fell out in the car. 

"What? No, you masturbated and the heat passed" I argue, but I feel fear grow inside. 

"No, it passed by itself" he murmurs then and I feel all hope leave me. We are doomed. 

Before any other thought can pass through my mind the wolfy side of me convinces me to touch him. I lean in over him pulling the fur from his clutches and sliding my hands under the sweater that he has on. He whimpers but I cannot make words out of it, nor can I tell if he sounds scared or pleasured. 

My inner wolf decides that he is moaning in pleasure so I continue to grope him and smell him. I am thoroughly getting drunk on his scent when he suddenly cries my name. It is not a pleasured cry nor a fearful cry, it is a sad sound that makes my whole being freeze. My mate is sad. 

I cannot think of anything else. It takes me over completely and I am finally freed from the grip of his pheromones. Still drunk on his scent and still full of desire I am alarmed and somewhat awake. I can't belive I almost hurt him again. I deserve to die. 

Biting down hard on my wrist I think of how much I hate myself. I am selfhating, alarmed and horny, and the only thing I can do is stare at Elmer. My mate looks truly pitful. He is squirming in pain beacuse of the head but tears make his eyes red, and he looks at me as if he can't make up his mind. He gasps again, trembles and rubs himself over his pants, all while looking at me as if I am the antodote to what has poisoned him. 

I am still leaned over him on the divan. He is so close that I can't tell if it is his heart or mine that is beating panickedly. All I know is that I want to do all sorts of things that I have no right to. But the moon doesn't understand that, so she makes Elmer's body tremble in another wave of heat. His eyes fog and the mumbling cry that escapes his lips sounds as if he's giving up. 

The hazy eyes fly open and stare at me as he freaks out. In a manner much like a man on fire he wrestles his pants off and starts to rub himself firecly. For I second I hope that it will work but Elmer starts crying. Big, salty tears run down his cheeks and his hand stops. 

"I hate this" he cries and rubs his head agains my chest. "Hate it." 

"I know" I agree because it is all I can do. We both know that he isn't going to last much longer and that mating is inevitable. He snivels into my shirt and I just stay leaned over him with a jaw clenched like stone muscles on a greek statue. Neither of us wants this. I don't want to do this against his will. I don't want to do anything against his will. 

But soon our instincts will take over. I unfortunantly know that there is very little that can stop me. Not even an alpha wolf could hold me back. Elmer doesn't stand a fighting chance. Not that he would fight me. The heat will make him spread his legs for me no matter how he feels about it. 

For a second I am devastated by the horror of our fates. This will destroy us like nothing before. It might even break our bond. And in that moment I realize that I cannot afford this. If I want a chance to love Elmer then I have to make this right. I have to fight for him. 

I climb off him and hunch down at his side too look him in the eyes, so that I am not above. His teary gaze is heartbreaking. I caress his wet cheek and smile softly to comfort him. 

"Hey, I know that this is scary. I know that this is the worst thing that has happened to you. And I know that you don't want me to touch you" I tell him, petting him gently and without any desire showing. 

"Mhm" he whimpers and reaches his hand down to rub himself but stops and gasps in pain. 

"But could you trust me? Just a little? I could touch you to help get some relief, just to make it go way" I beg him with a kind tone that I didn't know my voice could form. 

Elmer looks at me as if he really wants to say no but when I look at him with puppy eyes he gives in. With a rueful nod he agrees. Awkwardly I position myself in front of him. I stroke his bare legs with my hands and he gets harder and harder in front of me. 

"I will stop if you tell me to" I promise him. I inhale his smell and a fire erupts within me. I have to use my shame to keep me from doing what I want to. 

It is mesmerizing how Elmer trembles in excitement but I hate how he grips the side of the divan in fear. Slowly and gently - all while smiling reassuringly - I let my fingers travel closer to his excited dick. 

When my finger nudges the base he gasps and it twitches. Still he doesn't tell me to stop so I carefully put my fingers around him and begin to stroke him up and down. I do it the way I like it done. It's propably not very good but he is so taken by the heat that he cums over my hand in a matter of minutes. 

The gasp that is released out of his throat is maginificent. He heaves and pants and I can't get enough of his quiet noises. He doesn't really moan but the way he breathes in pleasure is enough to make me figure out what he likes. 

I make him come again but he is still in so much pain that it hurts to look at him. Therefore I bend down and let my wet tongue graze over the head of his dick. The red top is sensitive from my handjob. Elmer arms fly up to stop me. 

"You don't like it?" I ask with a soothing and careful voice even though my own thing is throbbing in my pants and I would like to nothing but fuck him until he faints. 

Elmer has succumbed to the head and the pleasure has become the most important thing in his mind right now and so he nods for me to go on. I press my lips against his tip. Precum leaks out and I taste the salty flavor. 

Elmer stares at me while I let the tip slide past my lips and into the wet warmth of my mouth. I slip my tongue around him and lick it sofly. He cums in long splurts into my mouth while looking at me with eyes dazed by lust. 

By the moon, how I love him.