I just want to dissappear
I fear the darkness that waits
But at the same time it excites
Just to be nothing to hear nothing to see nothing
The pain and noise around me is starting to drown
My head is so far under water
Popping bubbles invade my ears
Oxygen deprived lungs scream their last
Clawing at the world but sinking deeper
The way back is becoming bleaker
My vision begins to blurr
But my thinking does not dull
The farther I sink the colder my mentality on mortality becomes
I lose sight of the faces around me
All those smiling posed photos fade
I focus on my feet disapearing into the depths
One kick further towards the light
One kick further towards the night
Everything in my heart is conflicted
My oxygen is being restricted
The light blends to a dark tunnel
Everything has become distorted
Are they laughing or are they crying
I can't tell anymore I must be dieing
Capillaries burst behind my eyes
Creating fireworks that blind
There is just so much noise
I gladly sink into the water
Pressure builds and holds me still
It is so quiet now other than my heart
My heart I forgot I had
Beating loud and strong
In its last rhythmic song
Nothingness is addictive
No yesterday
No tomorrow
No more sorrow
My brain is still running
Seeing the desolation and despair
No wonder I gasp for air
I'm just so tired
Screams of society reverberate
As it frantically scrambling for control
To feel something in its soul
There's so much noise in the world
Anger and fear continuosly appear
Hatred though they know not why
Every thought and emotion
Slams me like the ocean
Even when the sun shines
Those golden spears cannot reach me
Refracted through the water
Bits of gold jutting through opaque blues and greens
The warmth quickly dissapating
I have sunk so far the pressure is all around me
The cold has reached my bones
My marrow has frozen
Hypothermia is setting in
Soon the waters will claim me
By body is one with the termoutous tide
But the silence is euphoric.
YOU ARE READING
Ink & Tears
PoetryThis is a collection of poems that I have written about my struggles with depression, anxiety, love, nature, and the darker aspect of the world that seems to always hammer on my heart. I hope this reaches some of you.
