The Will to Live - Xiao x Reader

Part 26 - Xiao

"Y/N," I need to know. "Are you going out again tonight?"

Y/N nods. "I won't take you with me," They guessed my next question. "Sleep well." 

Y/N kissed my forehead and flew out of the window. Why won't they let me help them? I felt my confusion become aggravating. 

***

"Let me fight with you... Let me serve you."

Y/N crouched down and lifted my head.

"Please," I begged.

"I can't," They stroked my hair.

"Why?" I felt agitated and raised my voice, "Y/N I want to be with you! I don't care what consequence I face."

"...I won't allow someone I love to be endangered further because of me."

"But..."

"Is that what you thought I'd say?" Y/N's voice deepened as they cut you off, "Why would I want help from someone like you? You're a monster yet you would still only get in my way!"

"Y/N, please." I begged as they walked towards the door, "Don't leave me."

They laughed, "You mean nothing to me." Y/N slammed the door behind them...

I sat up quickly causing my head to spin, Was it a dream? I wondered, Y/N wouldn't actually... Would they? I replay their last words, "You mean nothing to me." That can't be Y/N... Panic overthrew my sense of logic, What if they don't want to be with me? My eyes dashed around the room and I could hear my heartbeat in my ears. 

"Oh?" Y/N walked out of the bathroom. "You're awake." They smiled and wandered towards me while drying their hair with a towel.

Y/N wore an oversized shirt with short pants that were barely visible to the eye. Y/N has definitely become more comfortable yet...

"You seem troubled," Y/N placed their hand on my head. "Do you want to talk?"

"It was..." I hesitated, What would Y/N think if I said I had a dream about losing them. "Just a nightmare."

It was a nightmare, I reminded myself, however... It was all I could think about. "You mean nothing to me." Their words rang in my head, it looked like Y/N but... That wasn't their voice.

Y/N crawled up next to me and laid their head on my shoulder. "I'm here," They reassured me. Y/N's voice was enough to set me at ease. It was so calming and gentle; the complete opposite of when I first came across them. Their breathing began to settle and Y/N placed more weight on my shoulder. 

"Did you fall asleep?" I spoke quietly, I didn't want to wake Y/N up if they had.

Y/N lifted their head, "No, why?"

I turned red with embarrassment, "Nothing." I tried to look away but Y/N clutched my chin and pulled me towards them.

"You're cute when your blushing," Y/N giggled before kissing my cheek. Y/N released their grip and I touched my face. Their hands are so... Soft, I left in a dream. 

Y/N abruptly covered one of their hands with the other and I instinctively grabbed their wrist, dragging it towards me.

"Xiao," Y/N winced.

"What is this?" I look at their hand closely. A drip of muddy coloured blood dripped through their bandaged arm and I felt anger fill my thoughts. Whoever, whatever is responsible for this will pay. Y/N tried to pull their hand back but I tightened my grip.

They bit their bottom lip to muffle their cry while tightening their eyes shut. "You're hurting me," Y/N breathed heavily. "Please... Let go."

"What is it?" I demanded again as I loosened my grip.

"The karma that mixed with my curse." Y/N grabbed a small towel and cleaned up the blood, "It's nothing you need to worry about."

"What do you mean?!" I found myself yelling.

Y/N covered their ears. "Please just... Forget it," They mumbled.

I'm such an idiot! I beat myself up, How could I yell at them? I felt guilty for being rough but, how could they ask me to just forget that? I sighed.

When I returned to reality, Y/N had moved away from me and was now sitting on the window sill, looking out at the horizon. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up.

"You don't have to apologise," Y/N turned to look at me. "I never told you that adding additional pressure to my curse directly... F*cking hurts."

I stood dead in my track, "I..." "You don't have to apologise," I stopped myself, but... "I'm still sorry," I struggle to focus on my words.

"The Lantern Rite is tonight, right?" Y/N changed the subject but immediately looked over to the window. "Sh*t," They whispered under their breath.

I walk towards the window to check what they were looking at. "That's right," I struggle to understand what had Y/N's attention, I want tonight to be... Perfect.

"Aether's calling me," Y/N's voice startled me, it was almost frantic. "I'll be back."

"Wait!" I wrapped my finger around Y/N's, "When will you be back?"

Y/N placed their other hand on my head, "I'll be back for the Lantern Rite, I promise."

A bright flame engulfed Y/N. Please be there, I begged.

***

The Lantern Rite officially starts in half an hour but... Y/N isn't back yet. I felt my heart tense, What if they don't come? This year was the first time I'd asked someone to spend the Rite with me. I shook my head and repeated their words to myself, "I'll be back... I promise." 

Before showering, I looked through the room to check if I had other clothes; I didn't. I sighed, I wonder if Y/N will show up in their usual clothing too. 

I walked into the bathroom and slide my shirt over my head, my injury from a few days ago was completely gone; not even a scar remained, Y/N really is amazing. I removed the rest of my clothing before turning on the shower. The warmth of the water reminded me of Y/N's warmth, but they weren't here. I felt myself blush at the thought of Y/N being with me. No, I told myself.

I rubbed some soap over my body before washing my hair. I was trying to focus on cleaning myself yet, all I could think about was Y/N... Would they show up?

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my body before blow-drying my hair. I dressed myself and looked around for a brush... Sh*t, I looked through my stuff. I don't own a hairbrush. I looked in the mirror and tried to comb my hair with my fingers but it only left my hair looking messy and uneven. 

In a panic, I looked through the room and found Y/N's brush. I scrunched my face, I shouldn't use it without asking... I look at the time, 5:45 pm, 15 minutes. Sorry Y/N, I took their hairbrush to the bathroom and brushed my hair.

"I'll be back," Y/N's words rang in the back of my head. Where are you?

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A/N: Gotta love waiting for a lover. Feel free to leave any suggestions you might have in the comments and thank you for 70 votes!

Take care.