Guardians of the Galaxy

Rocket, you Idiot

When we got to the cockpit, we noticed there was an armada of Sovereign fleet ships.

Quill: That's weird. We've got a Sovereign fleet approaching behind us.

Blake: Are they attacking?

Gamora: Why would they be doing that?

Drax: Probably because Rocket stole some of their batteries.

He said mindlessly.

Rocket: Dude!

He must've felt betrayed.

So did we.

Blake: What?

Drax: Oh, you're right. He didn't steal those. I don't know why they're after us. What a mystery this.

Then the space battle started.

Quill: What were you thinking?!

Zoe: Are you crazy? We just helped those people and you stole from them?

Rocket: Guys, they were really easy to steal.

Blake: You call that an acceptable excuse?

Rocket: Come on, you saw how that high Priestess talked down to us. Now I'm teaching her a lesson.

Quill: Well, I didn't realize that your motivation was altruism. It's really a shame the Sovereign mistaken your intentions and are trying to kill us.

Rocket: Exactly!

Quill: I was being sarcastic!

Rocket: On no! You're supposed to use a sarcastic voice. Now, I look foolish.

Blake: You're already foolish to begin with.

Rocket: We're gonna go there?

Gamora: Can we put the bickering on hold till after we survive this massive space battle?

Blake: Oh, we might not survive so we might as well get it out, now.

Quill: More incoming!

Rocket: Good! I wanna kill some guys!

He screamed while he shot at them.

Gamora: You're not killing anyone. All those ships are remotely piloted.

Blake: Well, isn't that convenient?

We used evasive maneuvers to dodge blasts, but we got hit.

I could tell that Peter was getting anxious.

Quill: What's the nearest habitable planet?

Gamora did research.

Gamora: It's called Berhart.

Quill: How many jumps?

Zoe: Only one. But the access point is 47 clicks away and you have to go through that quantum asteroid field.

We looked and saw asteroids that disappeared and reappeared in a pattern.

We drove towards it.

Drax: Quill, to make it through that, you have to be the greatest pilot in the universe.

Quill: Lucky for us

Quill and Rocket: I am.

Quill looked at Rocket.

They kept driving, but they were fighting over the controls.

Rocket: What are you doing?

Quill: I've been flying this rig since I was ten years old.

Blake: You crashed us one time.

Quill: No, that was you while eating a bag of chips.

Rocket: I was cybernetically engineered to pilot a space craft.

Quill: You were cybernetically engineered to be a brain fart.

Gamora: Stop it.

Blake: Yeah. I'm with her this time. Do you need me to come up there and separate you two? I'll drive.

Quill: Blake, shut up and keep your butt in a seat!

Rocket: Quill, later on tonight, you're gonna laying down on your bed, there's gonna be something squishy in your pillowcase. You're gonna be like "What's this?" And it's gonna be because I PUT A TURD IN THERE!

Zoe: That's the best threat that you could come with?

Blake: Please don't. I'll probably smell it. Plus, it won't be pleasant to clean.

Quill: You put your turd in my bed, I shave you.

Rocket: Oh, it won't be my turd. It'll be Drax's.

Drax laughed.

Drax: I have famously huge turds.

Gamora: We're about to die and this is what we're discussing?

They kept fighting over the controls.

Quill: Dude! Seriously!

Rocket: Hey, let me-

An asteroid hit us.

We felt a cold turbulence.

We spun out of control and Groot was getting thrown around.

Quill activated the shield so to not cause anymore damage.

"IDIOTS!"

My guess, that could've Nebula.

Rocket: Well, that's what you get when Quill flies.

I've had enough.

Blake: Ok! That's it! You're in a time out! Get out of the seat!

Rocket: Hey! Come on, man!

I grabbed him out of the seat the put him in a corner.

Blake: Stay there and don't say a word while I'm driving!

Gamora: We still have a Sovereign craft behind us.

Quill: Our weapons are down.

Gamora: 20 clicks to the jump!

Then Drax put Groot on Gamora's shoulder.

Gamora: Hold on.

Zoe followed him.

Zoe: What are you doing?

Drax: I've gotta take out that ship. You know guns.

Zoe: Yeah?

Drax: Good.

Nebula was about to reach for a fruit but Drax kicked it away.

Drax: It's not ripe.

He attached a wire harness to him and Zoe and put on the spacesuits.

They grabbed guns and activated the shields.

The ship fired and hit the the thrusters.

Blake: We're taking fire!

Gamora: 15 clicks to the jump.

They jumped out.

Gamora: 10 clicks.

Drax and Zoe aimed.

Drax: Die spaceship!

He fired and destroyed it.

Gamora: 5 clicks!

But unfortunately, there were more ships that appeared.

Blake: Oh, come on.

Quill: Son of a-. They went around the field!

We began taking more fire.

Blake: We're not gonna last much longer!

Rocket: Can I get back up there, now?

Blake: No!

But luckily, and strangely enough, a bright light destroyed the ships.

What just happened?