Guardians of the Galaxy

Not what it used to be

On the Ravengers' ship

I woke up in pain. I was surrounded by yelling. Rocket was tied up in a chair in one corner and Groot was in a small cage hanging from the ceiling. Yondu was tied up in another chair near me. He didn't look in good condition. I looked around and saw a horrible sight. There was a man, the same man who tried to tell Kraglin to settle down, who was being dragged by the other Ravengers. They had wicked, bloodlust smiles on their faces. They threw him through the airlock and closed the hatch door. He banged on it in fear. One of them pushed a button and opened the other door to let him drift off into space. The laughed and jeered at him as they watched him die.

I was mortified. What happened? This isn't the Ravengers I once knew? We don't murder each other.

There was another red skinned, long haired Ravenger being dragged off for execution.

"Captain!"

He pleaded to Yondu.

"Help me! Please!"

Yondu just sat there. He didn't even look up. He didn't even move a muscle.

I was mad. Is he letting them die? He can't just let them do this.

"Blake?"

I heard Zoe, but I couldn't see her.

Blake: Zoe? Where are you?

Zoe: I'm behind you. I'm tied to a chair.

I looked behind me. She was tied to a chair. I was relieved.

Blake: Are you ok?

Zoe: I'm fine, but what's going on? Why are they killing each other? Is this what they're always like?

Blake: No. They'd never kill each other.

Taserface walked up to Yondu.

Taserface: You're the one what killed those men. Leading them down the wrong path. Because you're weak!

He hit him.

Taserface: And stupid!

He hit him again.

Taserface: It's time for the Ravengers to rise again to glory with a new captain! TASERFACE!

They cheered.

Blake: It's a revolt.

Rocket was laughing.

Rocket: I'm sorry. Your name is Taserface?

Taserface: That's right.

Rocket: What do you--? Do you shoot tasers out of your face or something?

I held in a laugh.

Taserface: IT'S METAPHORICAL!

They cheered again.

Rocket: For what?

I agree.

Blake: Yeah. Do you even know what metaphorical means?

He was lost. I got him, there.

Taserface: It's a name that strikes fear into the hearts of anyone who hears it.

Rocket: (Unconvinced) Ok.

Taserface: (To Rocket) Shut up. You're next.

Zoe: (Whispering) Are Ravengers always this stupid?

Blake: (Whispering) He been trying to convince people for years that it scares people. It never works.

Taserface: WHO SAID THAT?!

He looked at us and growled.

Blake: Nobody.

I said, defending Zoe.

He glared at us. He came over a grabbed my face.

Taserface: You watch your tongue, Slader. Or do you both want to be sent out of the airlock?

He let go and came over to Yondu with a knife against his neck.

Taserface: Udonta. I've been waiting a long time to do this for--. What?!

He was interrupted by Rocket's snickers.

Rocket: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I keep imagining you, waking up in the morning, looking in a mirror, and then all in seriousness you say (imitating his voice) "You know what would be a really kick-off name? TASERFACE!"

He laughs out loud. The other Ravengers started holding in their laughter as well.

Rocket: I mean, what was your second choice? Scrotum Hat?

They all erupted in laughter. Even Groot laughed.

He came over to Rocket.

Taserface: New plan. We're killing you first.

Rocket: Well, dying is certainly better than living an entire life as a moronic idiot who thinks Taserface is a cool name.

"That's enough killing for today."

I looked and saw Nebula standing in a corner. They all backed away from her.

I glared.

Taserface: I thought you were the biggest sadist in the galaxy.

Nebula: That was when daddy was paying my bills. The priestess wants the kill the fox and the coyotes herself.

Blake: Wolves.

I told her.

Nebula: And he has bounties on his head in at least three Kree provinces.

She referred to Yondu.

Nebula: I'll tell you. I'm not as easy to mark as an old man with a magic stick or a talking woodland beast.

I had to idea who she was referring to or what she was talking about.

Nebula: I want 10% of the take. And a couple more things.

I'm pretty that I had an idea of what she's up to. All of a sudden, Taserface shouted.

Taserface: Take the prisoners to the dungeons.

We were taken.

Zoe: What's she planning on doing?

Blake: My guess is she's going to look for Gamora and kill her.