My Love | James Potter

Chapter 29 - Werewolf insecurities

Remus Lupin had been feeling completely insecure today. Not his looks, or body, or anything like that. In fact, it was about him being a werewolf. Sometimes he'll be really insecure about his lycanthropy after a full moon and sometimes he won't.

Well, he was feeling it today. He kept thinking that he's a monster. He feels like one. Remus feels like he looks like a freak with all his scars littering his body.

His boyfriend, Sirius Black - which they had recently announced their relationship to the whole school and yes, they got weird looks for it but they couldn't careless. They got to freely walk around with the other's hand in their own. Anyway back to the point, Sirius had been trying to convince the boy to tell him what's been going on and why he's been so upset, Remus never gave in into telling him what was wrong, though.

He knew that if he couldn't get it out of him then he'd need help from his Remus' best friend. (Yes, I meant to put his before Remus. It's supposed to be cutee <3)

Sirius hurriedly got up and walked to the door as Remus asks where he was going.

"Just on a walk, Love. I wanna clear my head and think. I'll be back as soon I can, promise." Sirius replied as Remus looks at him with longing eyes.

"'Kay."

As soon as the dorm room door was shut, Sirius leant against it as he took a deep breathe and ran his hands through his hair. He felt like utter shit. The boy felt as if everyone still didn't trust him and it worried him that people would leave him for it.

His brother hated him. (Or so he thought)

James seemed to be keeping some things from him. The Potter boy never really kept things from Sirius.

Remus seemed more quiet than usual around him.

Peter, well Peter would glare at him sometimes and at other times he'd smile at him- this was one of the reasons why Sirius thought he could be bi-polar but realized that the Pettigrew boy was getting more comfortable around the boy lately that he didn't glare at him all the time. So he decided not to think about it.

Avery was okay. She treated him normally, as if she knew what he was going through but in reality she didn't. She had no idea. Well other than knowing how it feels to be treated differently after something happens- so yeah, I guess you could say she understands.

He was even thankful that Snape was still as rude and annoying to him and not treating him differently.

Snapping out of his thoughts as he sees Frank Longbottom walk up the stairs.

"Oh- hey, mate! How've you been?"

"Uh, okay.. Not the greatest but I'll get through it, ya know?"

"Yeah, man. I get it, hey, uh we have practice tomorrow and Wood said that if you don't show up he's kicking you off. Just thought you should know." Frank told him as leaned against the wall.

"Oh, thanks." Frank nodded as he went to walk away before Sirius stopped him, "hey, we should hang out sometime. You seem like a cool guy. Plus, I heard you were dating my best mate's girlfriend's cousin."

"Yeah, we should! I gotta go, Alice was gonna meet me in my dorm so we could-"

"Use protection!" Sirius laughed as he ran down the stairs. He could faintly hear Frank curse at him before the boy laughed.

"Oh- hey!" Sirius looked up as he recognized Avery's voice. He saw that she had come down from the girls dorm rooms.

"Hey, Moony has been acting weird. He just, be seems insecure and I thought that you could help."

"Yeah, of course! How about we head up there now."

°·°·°·°·°·°·°·°·°

Later, Avery and Remus had talked and she was now able to get to the topic of what had been going on with him.

"Rem, what's going on? You seem off. And.. I wanna know what's wrong." Avery said as she placed her hand on his shoulder.

"It's nothing, Aves." The boy said.

"It's clearly not nothing! Look I know that I'm kind of pressing you into telling me right now but bottling up your feelings will not help! Sure it'll stop you from getting pitiful looks but it won't be like that because you don't have to tell everyone! You know that it's not good to hold those feelings in." Avery rambled as the boy was looking down knowing she was right.

The Lupin boy sighed, "I know... It's just, Aves.. I feel like a m.. Monster. And I hate it, because I know that I am one and it just hurts to know that I can hurt anyone around me and- I hate this!"

"Oh, Rem.." Avery pulled the boy into one of her famous hugs and rubs his back.

"Look.. Remus, look at me," Avery said as she tried to get the boy's attention, "Remus! Look."

Finally, the boy looks up at her.

She sighs and starts speaking, "Not all monsters do monstrous things.."

Remus sniffles as he asks, "like who?"

"Like Remus. This boy Remus, he's my best friend who quite literally folds his socks and helps his friends whenever they need it. He's this boy who gets involved with pranking with his best friends. This boy who dreams of becoming a professor one day.. He's a boy who dreams. A human- well basically half human but being a werewolf is what makes you who you are." Avery ranted as she wipes the boys tear. After that she continues, "he is a normal teenage boy at the end of the day.. He's Remus Lupin."

Remus smiles as he hugs the girl tightly.

"Thank you. So much. I literally love you so much, Ave."

"Thank you! I love you more." The girl laughs she hugs him back.

"Okay, now get to Sirius and talk to him. He's worried for you, Rem. And use protection!"

"Shut up."

"Rude."

Author speaking!
Hey! Long time no see! I haven't written in a while! Also did you guys get the reference I made? Hope you enjoyed!