Until US

Chapter 41

It was already far past midnight, but Wan couldn't sleep. Too many thoughts were running through his head. The company, Samiya, their baby, View, and of course Win. Even though he was trying to be the strong older brother, who was not afraid of anything, the big brother who ensures View that everything is going to be alright and that Win will wake up and he will be ok, the truth was that he was pretty scared, too. He was so scared, but he wouldn't tell anyone. He had to be strong, for View. Win would expect him to be the strong older brother who takes care of his little brother, especially because Win was not able to do that at the moment. The only person he could show this pathetic side of him was Samiya. She has always been there for him like no one else was. She was his other half and the person he trusts the most. Even though he loves his brothers more than anyone else in this world, or especially because he loves them more than anyone else, he does not want them to know this side of him. He does not want them to know that he, too, was afraid sometimes. But in his whole life, he has never been more afraid than he was now. Afraid of losing one of his most important people.

Wan was lost in his thoughts when suddenly the phone rang. "Wan? What..what happened?" he heard Samiya's sleepy voice. "Who is calling at this time?" she asked while rubbing her eyes. Wan answered the call. "Hello? Wanichakarnjonkul" he answered the call. "Mr Wanichakarnjonkul. This is the hospital. I am sorry for disturbing you at this time, but..it is urgent." "What happened?!" "Please come to the hospital, immediately."

20 minutes later Wan, Samiya, and View had arrived at the hospital. View almost screamed at the doctor. "What happened with my brother!" he shouted. Wan tried to hold him back. "Unfortunately Phawin's condition has worsened. The treatment didn't work as well as we had hoped" the doctor explained while looking at Win's family with pity in his eyes. "What? But..what does that mean?" Wan asked worriedly. "We can't be sure, but there is a possibility that your brother won't wake up again. We have already put him on a ventilator because..he is not capable to breathe on his own. If his condition does not improve on its own..there is nothing..I am sorry." Samiya started crying. She couldn't hold back her tears anymore. Wan was holding her in his arms, but he was not able to cry. "Wan...he..he can't die! He has to tell HIS person..he has to tell them.." Samiya screamed while crying on Wan's shoulder. "HIS person?" Wan asked. "Yes. The person Win is so in love with..that he..Whoever it is..he needs to know."

Team was looking at Dean in shock, not believing what he just had heard. "Wh..what?" he was stuttering. "Samiya is Wan's.. Wan is..Wan is the father?..but..but I thought..I thought Hia and her.." "Win is living with them and..Samiya is pregnant, but Win is NOT going to be the baby's father but its uncle." Team fell down on his knees. He couldn't believe it. All this time he thought, Win was playing with him, that he was playing with his feelings, that he does not feel anything for him, otherwise he had told him about his girlfriend. He is not going to be a father. He had not been having sex with..Just to find out that he was a complete idiot the whole time.

"Team?" he heard Pharm's worried voice. Team started crying. He couldn't stop crying and sobbing. "I do now understand. You thought..oh Team..How could you think that Win would ever be able to love someone else when you were everything he was thinking about?" Dean said. And he felt bad for blaming Team. He really thought Team was hurting Win on purpose because he was not telling him the truth, but..there was a big misunderstanding on both sides. "Win has always only loved you. He was devastated when he heard about your engagement with Araya. He thought you were in love with her and..because he loves you so much he wanted you to be happy..with her. But because he couldn't bear watching you to being "happy in love" he decided to move to New York. Do you really think he would leave everything behind, his friends, his parents, the swim club..you..? He would have never done that..if he wouldn't thought.." Dean softly said while Team kept crying. "Hia!..I..I need him! I..I need to..He needs to know..that..that I.." "We know" Pharm softly said, rubbing Team's back while he was crying in his arms. Dean put his hand on Team's shoulder and squeezed it softly until Team looked at him. "You need to tell him. Team,..if you really..I mean..if you love him..tell him. Win needs to know. Come with me to New York..and tell him in person."

"But..didn't you say..P'Win is in a coma?" Pharm asked. Dean nodded. "Yes. But..sometimes people who are in a coma..they can hear what happens around them, even if they can't..talk. Maybe..just maybe..Win would sense Teams presence. Maybe.." Team was trying not to cry. He did not want Dean to call him pathetic again. "Team? Do you think..I mean..do you think you could..you could handle seeing P'Win like..at his current condition?" Pharm was worried about his best friend. What if seeing Win would make things worse for him. "I NEED to see him, Pharm. I need to see him..even though.." Even though..or especially because it could be the last time.

"I don't understand. First, Araya ends the engagement, and now you want to travel to New York? Why?" Team's mother asked angrily. "It is..because..because of Win. He..he is in a hospital..and.." Team was stuttering. "Just because of some boy? Doesn't he have any friends or family to visit him in the hospital?" his mother asked annoyed. "No.. it's not like that. He..he is..he had an accident and..he is now in a coma. I..I want to see him, please mom. Please understand." Team tried to explain the situation. "But..if he is in a coma..he wouldn't even know if you were there" she said. Hearing those words made Team angry. "Don't you understand that he..he could die! And..I NEED to see him! At least one last time!" he was screaming at his mother. The woman was shocked. Team has never talked like that to her. "You..Teerayu, you have never talked to me like that. What happened to you?" his mother asked stunned. "I am sorry, but..I will go. No matter what you say. I just wanted to inform you. I am not asking for your permission! I am done trying to please you! I am done trying to fulfill your expectations in me! I WILL go to New York to see Win! No matter what you think about it! I won't risk that I might never see him again and he'll never know that..!" "What? What will he never know? What does he need to know?" his mother asked. Team couldn't say it. Even though he wanted to, he couldn't bring himself to tell his mother about his feelings for Win. Not yet. Not right now. "Forget it! I will go, and there is nothing you could do to stop me!"