Eudaimonia | | Peter Parker x Y/N Stark

8 | ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛꜱ

ʏᴇᴀʀ ꜰᴏᴜʀ
ᴘᴀɢᴇ 4 ᴏꜰ 4

Dear Y/N,

Four Years.

I pretend that I am okay with that number. I pretend that I have realized that you will be dead. I put on a happy face everyday and everyone thinks I am okay.

I am not.

I am not okay, I have been told by my therapist that I am suffering from severe anxiety like I used to, I also have depression. I like to think that I am happy. I have pictures of you and Peter all over my house now, no words can explain how much I miss you both. Especially you.

No words.

I started spending more time at Avengers Compound, Pep noticed and put me in therapy. She knows how big of a hole I am in right now, Morgan is the only thing keeping me going. She is three now. The more she grows up, the more it hurts. Knowing that it was that long ago.

I miss you. I haven't spoken to any of the Avengers. Nat and I haven't talked since around last year. All of us are really horrified that we lost, we didn't win. We have never lost that badly. Never.

The loss cost death, chaos, and depression. We all are disappointed in ourselves. We all know that we are losers. I won't ever get you back. Peter and you will never be able to pursue your relationship and that is my fault.

I know that I am an awful person. I know that I could have prevented this.

I just hope that I will be able to be happy again. I really just want to be happy. I hope you are happy.

If you are reading this, we obviously won. I was reading about it online and it said to write to the loved one that has passed. So here I am. You could be thinking 'this doesn't sound like my dad,' I know that it doesn't. I am not how I was when you died. I used to be happy and I didn't know that you were the majority of the reason why I was happy.

I mean don't take that the wrong way, I love Pepper and Morgan. But what I would do for Morgan to be able to know who you are. Man, she is beautiful. You guys look alike. She is the sweetest kid ever.

I hope you will be able to read this at some point because if you don't, I don't know what I will do. I just hope you are happy. Please just be happy because I love you. A lot. I know that doesn't have anything to do with your happiness but I hope it just shows that I truly care for you I guess? I don't know.

I am sorry for breaking my promises.

I love you.

I miss you.

But most of all, I love you.

Love, dad.