Far from home|KTH

A place where I belong

Time was running out. There was no denying it, but a new era was coming. An era where Emma had to go home with the rest of the crew.

It was too hard to wrap her mind around it, her mind was refusing it.

That life she had forgotten a long time ago was quickly approaching and she didn't know how to feel about it. All she knew was that it felt surreal, and she didn't want to analyze what it ment.

Tae tried to stay strong for her, but also for himself. He tried to be realistic, but his heart wouldn't let him, it hurt too much to watch her slowly slip away from him. There was nothing left he could do.

She looked perfect in his sheets, like she belonged there. There wasn't a time in his mind when she wasn't a part of him, of them.

Her big eyes looked like deep oceans staring back at him, from where she was laying on her stomach, resting her head comfortably on her arm, playing with his hair with her other softly, lovingly.

"I'm going to miss you more than life", he said gazing into her soulful eyes.

"I know. I will miss you too", she replied with a slight smile filled with sadness.

"Don't forget me....please", he plead desperately.

She lift her head and looked at him intensely.

"Tae...how could I ever forget you? You are a part of me, you are impossible to forget. And most importantly; I don't want to forget you. Why would I?", she said, confused that he would even say such a thing.

"I know but still...time does unpredictable things to us", he continued. "In you I found what was missing in my life. I wasn't looking for you, but our paths must have been destined to cross. I'm grateful".

"I know. To say I love you is not enough. I never felt like this in my life. I hope you know that", she replied. "You are just pure magic and I'm lucky to have met you, borrowed you for some time".

He kissed her softly, holding her tight. He tried to wrap his head and heart around how to let go of her. It seemed impossible. He didn't want to live without her presence, without the way she made him feel.

"I don't know how to let you go tomorrow. I really don't...I need time to stop right now", he said quietly as a silent tear streamed down his cheek and he turned to his back, grabbing his hair in frustration.

Emma bit her lower lip to stop it from trembling, a thick lump forming in her throat. She couldn't handle watching him cry. Someone as strong as him seemed broken and tiny right now in her presence. All his walls were down and he mourned.

"I don't have the answer to that...I don't know how to do it either", she answered and cuddled as close to him as possible, resting her head on his chest.

His body trembled as he cried silently holding her. Her tears streamed down her face, gathering in a pool on his chest.

This was the hardest thing she had ever done and there just was not enough time left. Her gut turned, her chest felt tight. She wanted to escape the situation but at the same time grab onto every second she had left with him.

The theme of this last night was tears and intimacy, holding each other, mourning together for what was about to emerge. There wasn't much sleeping.

In the morning Tae watched Emma gather her last things and close her bag. He tried his hardest not to cry anymore, to stay strong.

It took everything he had, it was torture.

She wasn't as capable as him, her emotions showed on her face, in her body language. Her eyes were red and swollen, hollow. Her restless phasing in the apartment a way to deal with her anxiety. Every now and then she burst out in tears, gasping for air, not knowing what to do with her self.