45| Just Us

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I was in love with Nathan Jenkins—and it was a huge problem

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I was in love with Nathan Jenkins—and it was a huge problem. 

Not only was I in love with him...but it was that completely, totally, absolutely head-over-heels, hitting-the-baseball-over-the-fence type of in love with him. 

We had our tree house anniversary night a week ago, and after hours of him making love to me with his mouth, I knew I crossed that emotional line. More like jumped over it, actually. I tried multiple times to return the favor that night because I wanted to touch him, too. I wanted to make him feel how I felt. But he was stern on his rules

To make matters worse, ever since that night, all I've wanted to do was sneak into his room or the tree house and finally break down the last wall between us. I wanted all of him. He was it for me, I knew it as clearly as I knew my own damn name. But I was terrified to tell him how I felt. Boys were known to run scared when you dropped the L-Bomb on them, and Nathan Jenkins would mostly likely win the gold medal for Fastest Runner is he heard those three little words too soon. The last thing I wanted to do was to scare him off. 

"Are you going to spill the details or not, Karma?" Lanie stepped in front of the large mirror and examined the sunglasses she was trying on. "Harper and I have been asking about your big anniversary night all week and nada. Even Nate is keeping his yap shut." 

Good boy. Even though he and I didn't mention keeping the details about what happened a secret, we trusted each other. And that night was for us. 

"I'm not saying anything." 

"I bet they did it," Harper guessed from behind me. When I didn't answer, she stepped around me and poked my arm as her eyes widened. "Oh. My. God! You guys totally did it!"

Eye roll from me. "No, we didn't."

Lanie faced me with a grimace. "I take back my request for details. Ew. Just...ew." 

"We didn't do it! We didn't have sex!" I wish we had, though. That night would have been even more perfect. But I understood why he set the rules he did. I was self-conscious at the time, and thinking about those other girls was making it hard for me to believe that he was attracted to me like that. 

I had no doubts now. Not a single one. 

"Keep your voice down," Lanie hissed and Harper chuckled. 

To the right I saw the older woman who was in the same area of the store as us. She had a disappointed expression and shook her head before walking away. Whatever. 

Brushing my hair back, I reached for a random item from the clothing rack and held it in front of me. "We didn't do it, you guys. We just had an amazing night together." 

Lanie shrugged and went back to checking out her reflection in the mirror. Pretty sure she lost interest once Harper suggested sex between me and Nathan. Considering it was her brother, I didn't blame her. 

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