it's u || minsung

17

"minho hyung?" jisung shook him to wake him up. he'd noticed him tossing in his sleep, mumbling incoherent words as tears streamed down his face.

"hyung, wake up!" jisung shook him harder.

minho sat up quickly, sobbing into his hands.

"hyung are you-"

"get away from me!" minho sobbed, pushing himself further on the bed to try and get away from jisung.

"hyung..." jisung mumbled, disappointed.

"i said go away! i don't want to see you!" minho yelled.

"why?" jisung questioned.

"BECAUSE YOU LOOK LIKE HIM." minho screamed.

"what?" jisung was taken aback.

minho just continued sobbing. jisung didn't know what to do. with perfect timing there was a rushed knock at the door.

"what was that screaming?" chan rushed in.

"i think minho hyung had a bad dream. i tried to comfort him but he wouldn't let me because i 'look like him' whoever he is." jisung explained.

chan went over to comfort minho, while felix walked over to explain it to jisung.

"he probably means his ex boyfriend. he was really toxic and abusive. he broke up with minho two years into their relationship. AFTER they finished having sex. he put his clothes on and dumped him. he was cruel. and a cheater." felix explained.

jisung couldn't lie to himself. it hurt him to find out he was hated because minho didn't even see him as himself. he looks at him and sees someone whos cruel. not han jisung. but he brushed it off, for the sake of minho.

"oh." is all jisung could say.

"you okay sun?" felix asked gently.

"yeah uhmmm, i'm going to go check on minho hyung." jisung walked back over to minhos bed.

"hey sung." chan greeted him.

"hey, is he okay?" jisung asked.

"he will be." chan said, jisung just nodding.

"okay. i hope you feel better soon hyung." jisung said to minho as he walked away.

jisung curled into his bed, letting his thoughts consume him as his two friends took care of minho.

you can't even be seen for yourself. but it's not his fault he sees you as his ex boyfriend, it's yours. it's your fault for looking even the slightest bit like him. you will never be good enough han jisung. never. for anyone.

"good morning hyung. i hope youre feeling better." jisung said sleepily.

minho didn't say anything, going to the bathroom and getting ready. jisung ignored the way his heart had this particular ache today. he didn't have any energy.

"hey sun! let's go, why aren't you ready?" felix asked.

"hey lix, i actually think i'm just going to stay at the hotel today. is that okay?" jisung said quietly.

"of course. do you want me or hyun to stay with you?" felix asked gently.

"no, it's okay. thank you though. have fun." jisung smiled.

"okay. text us if you need anything." felix smiled, leaving the hotel room.

"have you taken your 'vitamins'?" minho asked as he walked out of the bathroom.

jisung uttered a small "no", not being bothered to look at minho.

"you need to take them." minho said coldly.

"i will." jisung said quietly.

"what is up with you today?" minho asked, feeling the genuine concern take over.

"nothing, go have fun hyung." jisung smiled.

"o...kay..." minho mumbled, grabbing his things and leaving.

jisung let out a sigh, staring up at the ceiling and letting his thoughts take control.

"sun, we gotta go." felix said as he entered the room. jisung was still laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling. he hadn't moved all day. he hadn't eaten. he hadn't had any water. he hadn't taken his meds. he hadn't uttered a word since this morning.

"sun? jisung?" felix worriedly walked over to where jisung just laid.

"sorry, what's up?" jisung asked, coming back to reality.

"we gotta go." felix said gently. "are you okay?"

"yeah, i'm fine. just tired." jisung smiled, getting up to get changed.

"we'll wait for you downstairs." felix smiled.

jisung got changed, grabbing his bags and going to the hotel lobby. everyone walked out to the bus, sharing worried glances to jisung. the bus ride was silent, as if everyone was too scared to speak.

"that performance was amazing! especially you jisung." felix smiled as they got off stage.

"thanks....li..lix." jisung stumbled, feeling his body go numb. he was light headed, losing touch with all his senses. before he could say anything to anyone, his body dropped to the floor.

"JISUNG!" chan rushed over to him, shaking him lightly.

"we have to take him to the hospital." minho said, worry written all over his face.

"he hates hospitals." felix said calmly. "he wants to fully enjoy this tour. wait for him to regain consciousness and i'll talk to him."

"hyungs im scared." jeongin cried, being pulled into a hug by minho.

"don't be scared." felix was trying to remain calm. "it'll all be okay."

"SUNG!" chan shouted as he noticed the boy regaining consciousness.

"don't yell." felix scolded.

"sorry." chan said, helping jisung to sit up.

"i'm sorry guys." jisung sighed, getting up.

"hey, don't apologize sun. let's go talk, yeah?" felix said gently.

a/n: jisung makes my heart ache :(