Coffee & You (BOYXBOY) (COMPLETED)

Chapter 23: Beam

I woke up in Lam's arms again. This was becoming a habit but I realized he and I slept better next to each other.
I looked at him and he was just snoring away softly, all vulnerable. None of that Ice Prince image.

Sometimes I wonder what ran through his mind. I could tell he sometimes wasn't being honest about everything in his life. I just knew that I always wanted to be around for him and ensure he was OK.

But sometimes I did wonder if he really needed someone. He seemed so strong and capable. That day when Kit had mentioned about couples, he had just ran away. I wonder if that thought made him feel so awkward, he felt the need to get away. But more importantly the way he had reacted had made me sad, I realised.

I never believed in dating friends as I felt the friendship could get ruined but I got to admit, sometimes my feelings towards Lam wavered constantly. I felt like he was more than just a friend to me without even me realising it.

I was lost in my thoughts and didn't realize that Lam had woken up. He was looking at me. I came back to reality when he turned towards me and the movement caught my attention.

"Hey, awake? What time did you sleep? Sorry I knocked out first" I said softly. He smiled at me and just assured me it was all OK. He said he had only 1 lab at 3pm whilst I had only a quiz at 2pm so we both had time to just chill. He adjusted his body gently and just brought me in closer. "Still early. Sleep a while more". I nodded and just rested my head on his shoulders. He wrapped his left arm around me and his lips were almost touching my forehead. I just raised my head up a bit and realised I could kiss him if i wanted. His eyes were closed and his eyebrows a little furrowed.

Not exactly sure on how to word it but I leaned up and kissed him softly. It just felt right and his eyebrows stopped furrowing. It was a very chaste kiss, quick and soft. He opened his eyes looking at me. I couldn't quite read the expression and it worried me a little. But then, Lam leaned forward and kissed me back softly. I felt his lips go in and he tried to pry for access. I opened up willingly and it turned into a deeper kiss. His arms around me tightened whilst I gripped his shirt in return. He caressed my cheeks as he continued kissing me. It felt so good, neither of us wanted to separate. But we eventually came up for air. Our faces were red, all  blushing red and our lips were swollen.

We both looked at each other for a very long time, unsure of how to break the ice. It didn't feel wrong at all though it was out of character for us. I was about to speak when his phone rang. We used that as an excuse and broke apart slowly. He sat up and answered the call whilst I went off to shower.

I was just very confused and decided to take a breather. I came out of the shower 15 minutes later, all refreshed. I came out of the bathroom, to see Lam seated on the bed, just looking at his phone.
"Is everything OK?"
"Yea all is. It was just Ming asking about some school stuff. Erm, I wanted to say.."
"Yea? Oh the kiss? Yea let's not think too much about it. Sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I know you don't fancy me that way. Maybe I just been too deprived. Haha, sorry k?"

I jumped in before Lam could say anything. I looked at Lam who had the most unreadable expression ever. For the first time, I could not even guess what was going through his mind. Like zero clue. He did look abit angry or sad?

"Do you consider it a mistake? Like done in the heat of the moment?"

I frowned hearing Lam's voice. It was dangerously soft like as if I was treading on thin ice. "I shouldn't have done it. I'm sorry. Pretend it didn't happen ok?".

That was all that Lam heard. He stood up, took his jacket and left. Before I could register everything, he had disappeared. What the fuck?! I immediately called him but he rejected my calls. I kept trying and trying and he rejected all.

Why do I feel like I screwed things up?